Deep Running
by zebraboymom
Summary: Olivia and Nick are sent to Quantico for training. What she finds there rocks her world all over again. N/O but ultimately E/O.
1. Chapter 1

**Deep Running**

**Chapter One**

**Zebraboymom**

**Disclaimer: They belong to me in my dreams only. **

**Author Notes: I read about this special program at Quantico and remembered that Elliot was there during the episode when Sonya was murdered. I thought it would make a great backdrop for another scenario where Liv and Elliot are brought together again. Captain Cragen makes a decision that he hopes will change Olivia's life forever. He wants to see her happy and knowing what he now knows he thinks he has a way to make that happen.**

Donald Cragen leaned his elbows on his desk and looked out his office window into his squad room. He sighed, looked down at the paperwork in front of him and then back up at his best detective. She was like a daughter to him and since the man he thought of as a son was gone, he was determined to look after her for him.

Olivia was sitting at her desk clicking her pen over and over again as she did her paperwork. She had that wounded look again. It broke his heart to see her giving away another piece of herself. She bled for the victims more than ever and the hole in her heart left by her partner only seemed to get bigger every day without him. Fin was watching her openly and Amaro was watching her out of the corner of his eye.

He liked Nick a lot. He had watched how the young man had gradually earned Olivia's trust and he knew without a doubt he would have her back if this plan of his didn't work. He knew in his heart this was meant to be, but it might be a rocky road and Olivia would need his support. The two of them were gradually working into a great partnership.

Their most recent case of an abandoned baby who's mother had been raped and killed had taken a toll on Olivia though and her face looked wearier than it ever had. He knew the decision he was about to make would either bring her happiness or destroy her, but either way there would be closure. He signed the paperwork and stood up, crossing to his door.

"Benson. Amaro. My office now."

The two detectives looked at each other startled.

"What did we do?"

"I don't know, Nick. What did you do?"

Nick held the door for Olivia. As she hesitated, he put his hand gently on her back and guided her forward.

"Have a seat detectives."

"Captain what's going on?"

"Relax Olivia. An opportunity has arisen for both of you as a result of the fine work you've been doing for the last year together. I've been given the opportunity to send two of my best detectives to train at The FBI Academy at Quantico for ten weeks. I've chosen you two."

Amaro looked stricken.

"Captain Cragen, my wife is still deployed and I would hate to leave my daughter for that long."

"This is a once in a lifetime opportunity to learn under the country's best teachers of law enforcement. Only one percent of law enforcement officers ever get this kind of training. It's a combination boot camp and academics. You'll be stretched. You'll train and team up with other officers from around the country. I think you'll both learn a lot about the new technology that's coming up out and be able to network with other agencies worldwide. Besides, you'll get a well-deserved break from the grind here. This is the West Point of law enforcement."

The two both started to argue at the same time and Don stood up in anger.

"Now this is not a request. It's an order. Spend the rest of the day getting caught up on your DD5s, pack your things and spend a couple of days with your daughter Nick. Olivia, visit Calvin and do the same. You leave on Monday. Dismissed."

Fin watched a seething Olivia approach his desk.

"What's going on Baby Girl?"

"He's sending us to train at Quantico for ten weeks Fin!"

"Wow. That's a long time."

"Tell me about it. I won't get to see Calvin for almost three months."

Nick walked up, brushing shoulders with Liv.

"What about me? My little girl is gonna think her parents don't care about her. My mother is gonna hit the roof. She offered to come and live with us and help, not be a full time guardian. I can't believe Cragen is doin' this."

"All I have to say is this better be one hell of a training opportunity."

Fin grinned at both of them and then suddenly grimaced.

"Think about us. We'll have to pick up all your cases."

Olivia patted Fin on the shoulder.

"Sorry old man."

"Who you callin' old? I still got it."

Liv plopped down in her chair, more depressed than ever and started on her stack of files. Don hoped he wasn't making a mistake as he watched her shoulders slump and her face become an unreadable mask. He prayed his plan worked. If it didn't he was worried about picking up the pieces.

Four days later Nick and Olivia arrived at Quantico. They were placed on a bus and sent to a collection of buildings in an isolated, heavily wooded facility. Here they would train and live together in close quarters for the next couple of months. Nick and Olivia found out they would be sharing a tiny room with two desks and one set of bunk beds. It was like a really bad dorm room.

"Oh, hell no."

"I'm not any happier about this than you are Liv."

"Please tell me you'll take the top bunk."

"Not a problem."

Each desk had a folder with information and schedules, some schools supplies and a notebook with dividers.

"I really do feel like I'm back in college or at basic trainin'. Oh man, look at this schedule."

"What?"

"Liv we go from 8-5:30 every day except Sunday. We get a day off as long as we stay at the training center. Some day off. There's homework every night. I am seriously startin' to think we pissed the Cap off really bad to get sent here. It feels like prison already."

Liv picked up her folder and groaned.

"We have to do two hours of physical training three days a week. It is basic training all over again. I'm too old for this."

Nick grinned at her.

"At least I'll finally get to beat you at somethin'."

"Oh yeah?"

"I'm just sayin' I can probably take you in anythin' physical."

"Oh really pretty boy? Well, bring it on man. Bring it on."

Liv was already starting to relax a bit. She had to admit it did feel good to get away from the horror for awhile and who knows, she might learn something new, maybe get a promotion out of Cragen. She had damn well earned it.

"Wow, did you see the list of participants? There are people here from all over the world."

"Uh, oh. We're due in room 101 for a welcome and to meet our instructors and trainers in ten minutes. We better head out."

They put their stuff away quickly and grabbed their folders and notebooks to head out and find the room. Nick was still reading up as he followed Olivia down the hallway.

"Hey Liv, listen to this class schedule. Computer Environments for Law Enforcement, Investigative Interviewing, Youth Violence…Labor Law Issues for Law Enforcement Administrators. It goes on and on. Yikes! Is it possible to flunk this thing? If we do will Cragen give us the boot?"

With his nose buried in the folder, Nick was oblivious to the scene unfolding before him until he ran smack into Olivia's back. She had stopped dead in her tracks.

He looked up to see what had caused such an abrupt halt to her progress and was unable to figure out what was going on. There was a man standing only a few feet away at the end of the hall talking to a tall willowy blonde.

Olivia took in a sharp breath as her eyes fell on the man she had missed for over a year. He was leaning against the wall just like he used to lean against her locker with that cocky posture he always had. She watched as he reached out and swept the blonde's hair over her shoulder with his left hand. He was flirting with her! When he brought it back to rest on his right bicep she focused on only one thing. Where there had once been a gold ring she saw only bare skin.

Nick watched as the man suddenly tensed up, apparently sensing Olivia's presence. Olivia squared her shoulders and walked straight towards him. The blonde patted the man on the arm and said she would see him inside.

He put his hands in his pockets and steeled himself as Liv approached him.

"Liv."

"Elliot."

"Uh…how've you been?"

"After a year all you have to say is how've I been? Go to hell Elliot."

Nick stared openly at the man now. So this was Elliot Stabler, the man who had done so much damage to the woman he worked with every day.

Elliot watched as the man with Liv moved up to rest his hand on her lower back before leaning forward offering his hand.

"Hey. I'm Nick Amaro. I'm Liv's partner."

Elliot tried to control his anger as the man used the nickname he had given Olivia so long ago. He watched as Liv leaned into the guy. She easily had ten years on him, but it was obvious the young man was smitten. He couldn't blame him. He'd been smitten from the first day he'd met the fiery woman. He'd been in love with Olivia Benson for over a decade.

It wasn't lost on him that they seemed connected emotionally and physically. It made him instantly jealous. He had never allowed himself to go there with her. Well maybe in the early days when they were close friends…before the love went so deep…before the pain of never being able to be together set in ruining what they had. He'd been married their entire partnership. Ironically now he was free and yet he knew could never have her now. He'd hurt her too badly.

That's why he'd stepped away from her that day after the shooting. He needed to protect her from him and his destructive behavior, the behavior that ended his marriage and bankrupted his relationship with his kids. Besides, he was no good for her. Hopefully this guy was.

"Cragen sent you here?"

"Yeah, why?"

"It's just…"

"Spit it out Elliot."

She was mad. He couldn't blame her. She obviously knew nothing about his relationship with Don.

"I talked to Don just last week and he didn't mention at all that he was sending you here for this training."

Liv's eyes went wide as she realized what Cragen was up to. Oh, hell no. Her voice came out sharp and clipped.

"It's good to see you Elliot. Take care."

As they started to leave, Liv couldn't help herself.

"Tell Kathy hi."

Elliot held up his left hand.

"We're divorced."

"I'm sorry to hear that. Let's go Nick, we'll be late."

As they walked past, Elliot couldn't help but turn around and look at Amaro's hand placed protectively on Liv's back.

He wore a ring. Married.

Nick looked down at Liv, whose eyes were wet. She was holding back tears. He bent to whisper in her ear.

"So that's the guy that's had your guts all twisted up for almost a year?"

The tortured chocolate brown eyes that lifted to meet his told him everything he needed to know. His partner was in love with Elliot Stabler.

It was going to be a long ten weeks.


	2. Chapter 2

**Deep Running**

**Chapter Two**

**Zebraboymom**

**Disclaimer: They belong to me in my dreams only. **

**Author Notes: Olivia tries to recover from the shock of seeing Elliot again. Liv turns to Nick as she tries to get her head around Elliot being there. What was Cragen thinking?**

It was obvious that Olivia was not herself as she allowed Nick to steer her into the meeting room and into a seat at one of the tables with two chairs. He dropped down next to her and tried to make eye contact, but Liv was just staring into space.

A few minutes later Ellliot came into the room and stood with a small group of men who were off to the side. Other officers from departments all over the country and the world filled the other tables up. It was a fairly small group compared to what Nick had expected. That meant they would be interacting with Stabler even more than he would have expected.

It was going to be life in a goldfish bowl for the next two months and two weeks.

For the life of him he couldn't understand what Cragen was thinking in sending Liv here without warning her first or at least giving him a heads up. Maybe he was afraid she would refuse to go. All he knew was that his partner was lost in another place and time.

The man they had met when they first arrived and checked in stepped up to the podium and began introductions. Nick listened as he explained the purpose for the training and what they would be doing. It was clear that the people in that room were the entire group of trainers and trainees for the duration. Elliot was one of only ten instructors. There was going to be no way to avoid him.

Nick looked the man over. Elliot's eyes were glued to Olivia and she was glued to the screen in front of her. Nick glanced down at her briefly and could see that her cheeks were scarlet. Just the man's presence in the room could bring this kind of a reaction? He realized he didn't know Olivia Benson nearly as well as he thought he did and he'd been her partner for a year now.

About half way into the introductions Stabler's name was called. When he took his place in front Elliot's eyes kept darting to Liv. Nick knew the man was dying for her to just look at him.

Liv never looked up once.

"As Jeff said, I'm Elliot Stabler and I worked as a New York cop for twenty-five years. The last twenty were in the Special Victims Unit. I'll be teaching Investigative Interviewing and overseeing some of your physical training. I look forward to getting to know each and every one of you over the next ten weeks. We're like a family here and if you need to talk about anything…a difficult case, burn out on the job or personal issues we are all available to you twenty-four hours a day."

This last part was directed straight at Liv. Her eyes flitted up once to find Elliot's boring into hers before she dropped them again. Nick could see Elliot's shoulders droop just a tiny bit. Most wouldn't notice it, but he did. He knew a little about interviewing and investigating himself.

"Thanks for coming and I look forward to talking with each of you."

The rest of the meeting continued, but Nick was off thinking about the last year and about the things he knew about Liv. She had saved him more than once and vice versa. He remembered killing the serial rapist and killer who had Liv and one of his victims trapped in his cabin. He did it without even batting an eye when he saw him about to draw down on Olivia.

He would do anything for her and he intended to support her no matter what. Tonight he would be having one very heated discussion with his Captain though.

After about an hour, they were released to get unpacked and settled in before a special dinner that was intended to let them all get acquainted. They would have time tonight to get to know their fellow officers. Nick had a feeling Liv was not going to want to go, but it was mandatory.

With a glare in Elliot's direction when he made a move to approach them, Nick pressed his warm hand once again to Liv's lower back and guided her out of the room.

They headed straight back to their room and he had a strong sense that Liv was doing everything she could to hold in some pretty heavy emotions at the moment.

Nick opened the room door and gently pushed her inside, closing the door.

Liv just stood in the middle of the room unmoving.

He had never seen her this vulnerable. Quiet maybe, but never frozen in place like this. Stepping around and in front of her, he gasped when he saw tears streaming down her face. The young man opened his arms to her as she gazed up at him shakily. The gesture seemed to break her and she was suddenly wracked with sobs. In the entire year they had been partners he had only seen her eyes get moist a few times and he had never seen her cry.

His chest became tight as he was overwhelmed with the need to protect her no matter what the cost. This was the Liv he had longed to know…longed to connect with. He pulled her tightly into his embrace and ran his hand in circles over her back mumbling words of affection. He began to rock her gently in his arms as she cried herself out.

Her scent made him weak in the knees as he continued to rock her. God if he wasn't married, he'd make her forget all about Stabler. Even though she was older than him, she was so beautiful and he was drawn to both her strength and her vulnerability.

After a long time Nick felt Liv sag against him. She had cried herself out. He pulled her over to the bunk bed, sat her down and knelt in front of her.

"Tell me what you need, Liv."

She shook her head and kept her eyes downcast.

"Please Liv. Talk to me. I've been told I'm a pretty good listener. That's what makes me good at interviewin' suspects."

Her eyes jerked up to his with a glare and then back down again.

"Sorry. That was a wrong choice of words. What I mean is, I've been told I have pretty broad shoulders and I'm easy to talk to."

Silence prevailed for several minutes, but he waited patiently for her. Finally she looked up at him from under hooded eyes and gave him a small smile.

"Well, you got the shoulders part right. Thanks for that Nick. I haven't really let myself cry other than the day Cragen told me he wasn't coming back."

Nick patted her knees and sat down on the floor in front of her.

"Okay, so talk. We got the rest of the day until the dinner party tonight. That's roughly five hours, so spill it."

"I don't even know where to start."

"How 'bout when you realized you were in love with Elliot Stabler."

Liv coughed and tried to clear her throat. She sat back on the bunk with her legs crisscrossed; mirroring Nick's and began to tell him their story.

"Well…I guess I've pretty much loved him for the last ten years."

"I thought you were partners for longer than that."

"We were. In the beginning we were just friends. He was married and I was dating and all we were looking for in our partnership…was friendship."

"So when did it all change?"

"He and his wife separated, but by then we were already so enmeshed with each other we didn't know what to do. We were together for hours on end, for days on end sometimes. We slept side by side in the cribs. We ate all our meals together. We hung out after work sometimes.

He slowly, but surely became my whole life. I didn't have any family. He became the only man in my life. There had always been this protective barrier between us and neither of us ever crossed it. Then there was one case. We were following a serial killer who had a couple of kids. It became a life and death situation and I couldn't pull the trigger. If I did I might lose him. If I didn't I was probably going to lose him anyway."

"What happened?"

"A sniper took the guy out and I didn't have to choose. In the hospital he basically told me there was no way we could ever cross that line we'd drawn, so I left, twice. It didn't matter. I always came back to him. He was like a part of me. I realized as soon as I saw him he still is."

Nick looked at her forlorn expression. His voice came out rough and emotional.

"I don't want him to hurt you Liv. I don't like to see you in this much pain. I…I care a lot about you and if he hurts you, so help me Liv, I will kill him with my bare hands. I've spent a year watching you mourn him and it's like he's back from the dead to taunt you again. I just don't get what Cragen was thinkin' when he did this to you."

"I think he realized I needed closure once and for all. I think he thought if the mountain won't come to Muhammad, Olivia must go to the mountain. So, I'm here. Let's just see where it takes me. You're a nice guy Nick. Maria is a lucky woman. And you are a great listener."

Liv shot him a big smile and his insides went to mush.

"Now, I'm going to change and we are going to go to the mountain so to speak."

Liv grabbed her bag and headed into the bathroom.

An hour later they emerged from their quarters.

Nick walked close to Olivia. He planned to stay by her side the entire evening. There was no way he was going to let Stabler inflict more pain on Liv tonight. They walked into the small cafeteria and found people in small groups chatting amiably. Nick pushed forward and cleared a way to the bar so they could get something to drink. Olivia followed him, her eyes searching the room in spite of what she'd told herself. She craved his face like a drug. She had missed those blue eyes, that smile…his laugh.

Elliot watched as they entered. His eyes had been locked on the door the entire time he had been there. He was watching for her. Now that he'd seen her again he couldn't get her beautiful face out of his head. He'd worked so hard to forget that face…that voice. He couldn't wait to catch another glimpse. His date, the willowy blonde, Cassandra, was hanging on his arm, but he was suddenly disinterested in anything she had to say. There was only one woman on his radar tonight, Olivia Benson.

**A/N: Next chapter…what is Elliot thinking?**


	3. Chapter 3

**Deep Running**

**Chapter Three**

**Zebraboymom**

**Disclaimer: They belong to me in my dreams only. **

**Author Notes: Sorry for the late update. I've been struggling with Sciatica, which makes it hard to sit up for any length of time. Sorry this is shorter than usual. Elliot's POV.**

Elliot hadn't been able to take his eyes off the door. Waiting for her to arrive had been agony. He had just wanted another glimpse of her. His mind had been on fire ever since he saw her in the hall. Seeing her was like a dream, but reality was so much better than his daydreams.

His date was saying something, but he was oblivious right now. Cassandra was a nice woman, but she wasn't Olivia. Every day away from his ex-partner had been torture and she was here. Every time he thought about her his breathing would become sharp and he would feel like he was about to have a panic attack.

The day he left, he thought he was doing the right thing. He had dragged her through the dirt for too long…held her to him selfishly for too long. Tried to ruin her for any other man even though he couldn't really have her. He shot that girl to save her and he would do it again and again. Every time he would choose her over the job and eventually he would destroy both of them. As it was he destroyed whatever was left of his marriage and his kids didn't want anything to do with him right now either. Only Eli was looking forward to his eight weeks with his dad this coming summer. They talked on the phone every day and he missed the curly haired little boy.

Cragen had helped him get the job at Quantico after a night of Elliot crying in his beer and telling the only man he thought of as a father what a mess he'd made of his life. Don knew he was in love with Olivia. He had told him so that night, so why did he send her here? What was he thinking? Did Olivia miss him too? Had Don told her he was here? Did she ask for the assignment? Was this his second chance?

He knew if he ever saw Liv again it would tear him apart. The memories of their partnership kept him tore up inside anyway. All those times he looked up from his paperwork into those soft brown eyes she had saved him. Every time he was about to lose control that soft sweet voice would call him by his nickname. She would step in front of him like a shield when she knew he was going to hurt someone. She let him say all the angry words he wanted to say to the perps to her and acted like it was no big deal. She saved him from himself over and over again. Without her in his life he was adrift.

His eyes lit up as he followed her across the room. She was looking for him too. He could tell and it made hope rise up within him. Would she give him a chance to explain? Could he find his way back to her? Would she even let him back in a tiny bit? Anything would be okay with him. He didn't deserve anything from her, but he prayed he could find a way to convince her over the next several weeks.

When he first saw her, his reaction had been to run, but that was her MO usually. Would she run again? Who was he to talk? He'd run away to a place five hours from her in hopes she would never find him, never find out what he had come to, never know about his failures and his weaknesses.

While she looked for him he studied her. Her hair was longer; she was thinner, but more muscular. She must be working out more. God she looked beautiful. All these months without her had left him empty.

Her new partner was obviously into her. He had tried to stake his territory in no uncertain terms. He was glad the guy had Liv's back, but he had to admit it hurt to see another man with her. They touched frequently, something she and Elliot had made a silent agreement not to ever do unless one of them was hurt. He was affectionate with her in a way Elliot had only been able to be in the early days.

The woman could get under his skin in a way no one else ever could.

Right now his eyes were locked with hers and he felt his heart skip a beat. She had found him. He couldn't look away and they had a silent conversation that pushed everyone else in the room out of his mind. It was just the two of them like always silently communicating.

In a second her eyes shut down and she turned away. She may as well have stabbed him in the heart.

Unbeknownst to Elliot Cassandra had been watching him and the exchange between the two. This woman meant something to Elliot. Of that she was sure. Was she a threat? Elliot looked like he was going to come out of his skin. She was a beautiful woman and the guy with her was no slouch either. There was only one way to find out. Before Elliot knew what she was doing, Cassandra grabbed his hand and crossed to where the two detectives were standing sipping on their drinks.

"Hi, I'm Cassandra Mead. I teach Labor Law Issues for Law Enforcement Administrators. I was an ADA for several years. It's so nice to meet you. How do you know Elliot?"

Elliot watched as Olivia took in the brazen behavior.

"Wow. That was a lot of information really fast, Cassandra. I'm Olivia Benson. I was Elliot's partner at Manhattan SVU. He didn't tell you? This is my current partner Nick Amaro."

Cassandra gushed over Nick and Liv thought she might gag. She watched the twinkle in Nick's eyes as he shook hands with the woman. It was obvious to him that she was staking her territory just as he had with Olivia earlier. Both of them were all too aware of the silence growing between Elliot and Olivia. Once again the ex-partners were talking with their eyes.

"I'd love to know all about Elliot in his early days. You must sit with us for dinner."

Before he could protest, she pulled Nick by the arm and directed him to a table for four just as the waiters began to serve their meal. Elliot shrugged his shoulders and looked at Liv waiting for her to disagree. Ever careful of herself Liv didn't skip a beat. She settled next to Nick as Elliot sat to her left. His knee accidentally brushed hers under the table and she quickly pulled it away like she'd been burned.

Nick could feel the tension and started to say something, but was cut off by Miss Quizative.

"So how long exactly were you two partners?"

"How long was it, Liv?"

Olivia hadn't heard her nickname slip from his lips in so long she almost sighed, but she was angry with him and turned to stare him down.

"Too long I'm afraid. Over thirteen years."

Cassandra was speechless.

"You never told me that."

"You never asked."

It was Liv's turn.

"So how long have you two been seeing each other?"

"Oh, not long. Elliot's divorce was just final about two months ago, so he's just starting to date again, but we're having a lot of fun aren't we Elliot?"

This was turning into a train wreck. How could Elliot get her to shut up?

"Food sure looks good. Let's not let it get cold."

Silence descended on the four of them and Nick reached over under the table to squeeze Liv's hand. It didn't go unnoticed by Elliot. Were these two closer than he had first thought? Surely Liv wouldn't hook up with a married man. She had always walked the line with him. What gave this guy the right to touch her? It took everything he had to remain calm when he was screaming on the inside.

Thankfully the tension subsided as the speeches began and the individual officers that would be in training were introduced.

Elliot was actually impressed with Nick's record. He was an ex-marine just like Elliot and had spent his earlier years in homicide, again, just like Elliot. It was eerie how much the two of them were alike.

When Olivia's name was called he looked over at her with pride.

"Detective Benson has one of the best reputations in the area of Special Victims in the country. She and her ex-partner Elliot Stabler, who we are lucky enough to have as one of our instructors, had the strongest arrest and conviction record of any team in the country. They had a 97% conviction rate and I look forward to watching the two of them together again this week."

As the last of the introductions had been made, dinner was over and everyone knew the next day would start early. Liv stood up quickly and turned to leave.

"It was nice getting to know you Cassandra. Elliot, good to see you."

Nick stood up and looked uncertain as the two detectives locked eyes.

"Liv, could we get together sometime this week and talk?"

"What's there to talk about Elliot?"

"I just…"

"Good night. Come on Nick. We have an early morning."

As Live escaped the room Cassandra looked at Elliot's lost expression. There was something significant happening here, but she wasn't sure what yet.

Liv practically fled to their room once she was away from the cafeteria and Elliot's piercing blue eyes. Nick tried to keep up with her. Once inside their room, she flew into the restroom and locked the door. Nick got ready for bed as he heard the shower come on. He turned the lights down and climbed into his bunk.

After about half an hour LIv came out and climbed into bed. He knew she'd been crying. For the entire year he'd known her, hitting the bathroom meant having a good cry, only to emerge and act as though nothing was wrong. He listened as she settled down under the covers. He heard a soft exasperated sigh escape her lips.

His soft voice resonated into the darkness.

"I'm here Liv, if you need me."


	4. Chapter 4

**Deep Running**

**Chapter Four**

**Zebraboymom**

**Disclaimer: They belong to me in my dreams only. **

**Author Notes: Nick and Elliot have a talk. **

When Olivia woke up the next morning Nick was already gone. She knew he always hit the gym early, so she took her time getting ready and decided to avoid Elliot by skipping breakfast and eating one of her granola bars. She would wait for Nick and they would head to class together.

Nick walked into the gym and took his position on one of the treadmills. He usually ran eight miles a day, so he needed to get going if he was going to get a shower and catch some breakfast with Liv. He had a restless night last night thinking about what Liv was going through.

He started to run and let himself slip into stream of consciousness. He needed to sort out his feelings for the woman who was now his partner. They spent a lot of time together and they were getting close. He could feel it, but he was married and even though he worried about his wife cheating, he would never cheat on her. He had some very strong feelings when it came to Olivia though.

The lines had been slipping lately between them and he found himself feeling more than protectiveness when it came to Liv. Just being with her made him want to be a better man. He had watched her work with the victims for a year now and he respected her more each day he walked by her side. There was something about her that made him want to be courageous too. He would take a bullet for her. Of that he was sure.

He had to pull himself together though. He knew last night what he was feeling was jealousy. What was he thinkin'? He had a beautiful wife and a sweet little girl. Everything had been messed up lately and he and his wife weren't communicating well. Being thousands of miles apart wasn't helping either. That was no excuse to go after Liv.

He didn't realize his eyes were closed until he heard a loud clunk and opened them to spy one Elliot Stabler lifting weights on the other side of the gym. It looked like he hadn't spotted him as there were several other officers working out as well. He watched the man pressing an ungodly amount of weight and he found himself watching with a mix of anger and awe. The guy had to be pushing fifty, but he had the body of a much younger man.

He looked away and tried to concentrate on his run when the gym started to empty out. It must be getting close to the end of breakfast and everyone was trying to grab something and get to class. He'd have to try and take something to his room while he got ready. He hoped Liv was figuring some things out for herself. He was really confused right now.

The next thing he knew a certain detective was standing in front of him.

"Amaro. Right?"

"Like you don't know."

"You watching her back?"

"Yeah. I am. Always do."

The look on his face spoke volumes to Elliot.

"You already have, haven't you?"

"Yeah. There was this serial killer. He drew down on her and I took him out."

"She okay?"

"That's a pretty broad statement Stabler. Yes and no. You left her messed up, you know that?"

Elliot dropped his head and stood with his hands on his hips, eyes down.

"I know."

Nick spit the next words out of his mouth.

"Why man? She deserved better from you. How could any man walk away from her and just cut her off? I could never do that."

"Yeah? So I guess that makes you a better man Amaro, but that doesn't mean I care any less for her. I thought I was doing the right thing in leaving."

"Yeah, well maybe you were wrong. Did you ever think about that?"

Elliot's eyes flew up to meet Nick's.

"She said something?"

"You need to talk to her man, not me."

With that said, Nick turned his machine down and slowed to a walk.

Elliot didn't leave. He just kept standing there. They were still sizing each other up. It was obvious to Nick that Elliot wanted to know just how much Liv meant to him.

Nick shut off the machine and stepped down.

"Just talk to her. You've got her flustered and confused and hurt all over again. She needs closure. Give it to her, but you hurt her and you'll have to deal with me. You got that?"

"How do I get her to do that? She's like Fort Knox with her feelings sometimes."

"I don't know, but you better find a way or you're gonna lose her forever."

Nick slammed the door to the gym open and left.

Half an hour later he found LIv sitting in the commons area looking out the window.

"You okay Liv?"

Her lashes fluttered for a second and he could swear he saw her swipe at an errant tear.

"Yeah. Let's go. We have Computer Environments for Law Enforcement in the computer lab first."

"Great. Geek class."

"Hey, I worked computer crimes once and I liked it."

"Good. You can tutor me."

The two detectives made their way down the hall and into the lab. For now both partners would have to push thoughts of Elliot Stabler out of their minds and focus.

The rest of the morning went smoothly. Even being in Cassandra's class was bearable, although Olivia could feel the woman boring a hole through her body with her stares. Ten weeks of this?

Nick watched the woman with interest. She had a certain strength to her that came across in her teaching. He could see how Stabler was drawn to her. She was a less intimidating version of Olivia. Nick thought about his morning run in with Elliot. He wanted to hate the man, but he couldn't. There was something about the way his eyes looked when he talked about Olivia that made Nick pause. He was pretty sure Elliot Stabler was in love with Olivia Benson and it was obvious she felt the same way.

But were they good for each other? The jury was still out on that one.

They spent lunch out on the patio area in the sunshine.

Liv's eyes were on the foliage and her mind was a million miles away. Nick watched her struggling with her feelings.

"Talk to me Benson. What's got you all tied up in knots, as if I didn't know."

"I just…"

"He cares about you, you know that. Right?"

"If that's true, then why did he leave me without a word? Who does that, Nick?"

Nick's statement was gentle.

"Maybe he thought he'd hurt you enough."

"What makes you think you know him?"

"I just think the guy made a mistake and now he's paying for it."

"How is he paying for it? He's an instructor here. He's got a girlfriend for crying out loud. He doesn't look like he's hurting one bit."

Liv stood up abruptly and grabbed her stuff.

"Stay out of this Nick."

Liv was off down the hall before he could catch up. He followed her into the next classroom and quietly took his seat beside her.

"I'm sorry, Liv, I just hate that look in your eyes."

Liv's face was instantly on his.

"What look?"

"The heartbroken one."

Nick rested his hand on hers on the desk.

"I'm your partner. There isn't anything I don't see when it comes to you Liv."

They didn't talk for the rest of the day until their last class. As Liv walked into the room, Nick heard her breath catch. Stabler was standing at the front of the class shuffling papers.

Nick leaned in to whisper in her ear.

"It's okay Liv. I'm right here."

As they took their seats in the back Elliot looked up and locked eyes with Olivia. He smiled softly at her and Liv felt that instant feeling of comfort that smile always gave her. She settled in and listened as her old partner started his explanation of the class.

She had to admit he was really good at this.

Elliot couldn't help but let his eyes wander to Olivia. He still couldn't believe she was sitting in a room with him. For the last year he had thought about her each and every day. And now she was just a few feet away from him. It was almost more than he could bear.

The class went really well and Elliot started explaining some of the new strategies in Investigative Interviewing. Liv was proud of him. He had made a new life for himself using everything he had learned as a detective over the years. He had interrogated so many perps during the time he had been on the force that she knew he could make a difference in the lives of the men and women he touched through this program.

In spite of her feelings for him she was glad he had found his way career wise. She envied him. Now that he was gone Liv felt like she was going in slow motion all the time. The work she had loved for so many years was becoming a noose around her neck. If she forced herself to admit it, without Elliot next to her she didn't find the fulfillment anymore. Nick was great to her and she cared about the young detective, but he wasn't El.

When the class was over, they stood and gathered their things. Elliot was talking to a couple of officers and as she walked past him to the door she smiled at him.

"Nice job, Stabler."

"Thanks, Benson."

They continued out the door and headed towards their room when they heard fast footsteps behind them.

Liv stopped and turned to find Elliot standing in front of her.

"Liv…do you think…uh…would you be willing to help me run a live interview in class on Friday? It would be just like the way we used to work on a perp. I…uh…think it would be helpful for them to see us…it in action. Theory is fine, but having a pro in the midst makes me think this could be an excellent teaching tool."

Nick watched the two face each other. They were like ants on a hot griddle, both of them. He watched in fascination as they did that thing where they didn't talk. It was all in the eyes. He was starting to feel uncomfortable with the silence when Liv finally spoke.

"Uh…I don't know El."

"Please, Liv?"

Nick couldn't help but feel sorry for the guy. His heart was on his sleeve. It was all too obvious.

"O…okay. I guess so."

"Maybe Amaro here could play the perp."

Nick was not amused.

"Very funny."

"Great. How about we get together tomorrow evening and work on what we're going to do. We'd need Nick too."

"Sure...I guess. Just don't give us a bunch of homework that night or you can forget it."

Elliot let out a happy laugh.

"Deal. See you tomorrow."

He turned to leave and Nick watched as Liv followed him with her eyes until he disappeared down the hall.

"Come on partner. Let's get some dinner."

Liv caught herself and smiled back at Nick.

"Right. I'm hungry."

And for the first time since they arrived she found that she was.


	5. Chapter 5

**Deep Running**

**Chapter Five**

**Zebraboymom**

**Disclaimer: They belong to me in my dreams only. **

**Author Notes: Two's company and in this case three is definitely a crowd as Elliot, Olivia and Nick "practice" for class on Friday.**

That night Nick sat at their desks studying for the computer class while Liv sat on her bunk painting her toenails.

Nick smirked as he watched her.

"Who knew under those boots you always wear, pink nail polish adorned those toes."

"Hey, I'm still a girl you know."

"I never once disputed that fact Liv."

Olivia looked up at him and blushed.

"Detective, are you flirting with me?"

Now Nick was blushing.

"I'm just sayin' you're all woman Liv…I mean…"

He just kept digging the hole deeper.

"I know what you mean and thanks for that Nick, but if word of these toes makes its way to the unit I will find you and end you. You got that?"

Nick relaxed in his chair again and the moment was over. She always knew the right thing to say to put him at ease.

"Hmm. Now blackmail is somethin' I could totally get into."

"Careful there. I could bring up some very funny stories of your first encounters at SVU that until now I have kept to myself, including busting down the wrong apartment door and thinking the ME was a witness."

"You wouldn't."

"Oh, but I would."

"Okay. Uncle. Uncle. No one will ever know that Olivia Benson does girlie stuff in her off hours."

Olivia continued to quiz Nick and he finished the computer homework in record time.

"Thanks Liv."

"You learn fast Nick. Don't be so hard on yourself."

"Oh, like you aren't."

"What?"

"Hard on yourself. You hold yourself to this unbelievable standard."

"I do it for the victims. I don't want to leave the defense with any loopholes to wiggle through."

"It's okay Liv. It's okay. I get that. I…admire you for it."

Olivia's eyes flew up to meet his just as he looked down at his paperwork nervously. Her voice came out way too soft and vulnerable.

"Thanks, Nick. That means a lot."

There was silence in the room for a while and Olivia started cleaning up her nail polish supplies and carried them to her bag in the bathroom.

"You nervous about tomorrow?"

Liv froze in her move to remove the toe separators.

"What?"

"I'm talking about working with Stabler again."

"You just do not know when to let things go do you?"

"Nope. It's what makes me a good detective."

"Okay. Yes. I am."

"You shouldn't be."

"Oh, really, detective. Do tell."

LIv turned off the bathroom light and climbed into her bunk.

Nick stood in front of her bunk and looked down at her

"The man cares for you Olivia. It's written all over his face. I'm a detective. Remember?"

Liv blinked up at him and it crossed his mind that she looked really pretty with her hair fanning out across the pillow.

She just stared up at him and refused to respond.

He sighed, stepped up on the rail of her bunk and hoisted himself up on top.

"Night Liv."

"Night Nick."

The next day went smoothly. They spent some time in the morning on an obstacle course and Nick had never heard such language form his partner before. Several expletives slipped from her lips. Elliot was in charge of the exercise and grinned at her as she crossed the finish line.

"Slowing down in your old age there partner?"

"I can still keep up with you Stabler."

"Of that I am certain."

They stood looking at each other for a few moments and Elliot let his eyes sweep across her features. She was beautiful in the sunlight with her cheeks flushed and her hair shining in the bright light. God he had missed her so much. He missed the banter as well.

Liv had forgotten just how blue his eyes were until they were outside. They sparkled back at her mischievously.

"How about we meet in my classroom tonight at 7:00?"

"We'll be there."

Elliot watched as she walked away.

Olivia looked back over her shoulder and smirked at him.

"Still watching my ass after all these years?"

"You better believe it."

Nick was aware of Liv all during dinner. Her knee was bouncing and she kept looking at her watch.

"Relax Liv, you're like a teenage girl waiting for her prom date."

"Eat your dinner and keep your comments to yourself Amaro."

"Touchy."

Against Nick's protests that they were too early, at about ten minutes until seven Liv and Nick headed to Elliot's class. As they approached the door they heard raised voices. It was Elliot and Cassandra.

"Look Cass, I'm just not ready to take the next step right now. I thought we were just having fun and seeing where it was going. Since when did we decide we were exclusive?"

"You know that's where we were headed until your ex-partner arrived. What's the story there? You owe me the truth."

"I don't want to talk about Liv with you. You know that."

"You forget I've seen you with her Elliot. The way you look at her…you're making me jealous and I'm not a woman who gets jealous."

"Look, there's a history there and we need to talk about some things. I just…"

"You need to choose Elliot. I need you to choose me now or walk away. I won't wait around until you 'figure things out'. Do you understand?"

"I do and I'm sorry it ended up this way then Cassandra. You're a very nice woman and I enjoyed the time we spent together."

"Are you breaking up with me?"

"We weren't together in the first place. You know that. The relationship wasn't that serious."

"It was for me."

"I'm sorry if I mislead you. I thought for her sake I could forget her. I can't."

Nick could see Olivia starting to get emotional so he decided he needed to intervene. He pushed the door open to the room and strode in like they just arrived.

"Hey Stabler. Let's get this thing rolling."

Liv followed reluctantly and when she entered the room Elliot's eyes landed on her. He looked incredibly embarrassed.

Cassandra on the other hand was a woman scorned. She looked at Elliot and then at Olivia.

"He's all yours Honey. Good luck getting him to open up though. I'd say he's worth it, but now I'm not so sure. Good-bye Elliot. I'll see you around."

The sound of the door slamming was all that was heard for a few moments. Nick wanted to crawl in a hole and disappear. His partner was just staring at Elliot and he was matching her stare.

Finally Elliot cleared his throat.

"Uh, sorry about that. Let's sit down and talk it through okay?"

The rest of their time went like clock work. The two of them were nothing if not professional. Nick couldn't believe how easily they pushed the earlier incident aside and focused on the presentation. After an hour Elliot called time.

"I think that's good. I think this will really give them a chance to experience the action like they do every day. After that, let's let them work in small groups and the three of us can float around and give pointers. You guys up for that? I promise extra credit."

Nick grinned.

"I can use all the extra credit I can get."

"You make a great perp Amaro."

"Gee thanks Stabler."

Olivia suddenly stood up.

"Okay, let's call it a night guys."

Elliot looked up at her startled.

"Liv could we…"

"Elliot it's been a long day and I think one difficult conversation in a day is enough. Don't you?"

"It doesn't have to be difficult."

Nick knew they needed space.

"I'm just gonna head back to our room and get a shower, okay Liv?"

No response. Elliot and Olivia were locked in each other's gaze. He quietly closed the door behind him.

It was completely quiet. They just looked at each other. The atmosphere was palpable as Elliot stood up and crossed to Liv. He stood as close as he could get to her without touching her. He was caressing her with his eyes. Liv could feel her own filling up with tears.

"I've missed you Liv. You have to know that."

"I've missed you too…so much…"

"I'm sorry I hurt you…"

"Why El? Why'd you leave like that?"

It was at that moment he spied the medallion he'd given her. His Semper Fi medal was hanging around her neck. His fingers brushed her soft skin as he lifted it tenderly into his hand and lifted his eyes to hers.

"I never left you Liv. I was hoping you would know that when I sent you this. I am and have been every day since…faithful to you. I was being faithful to you that day when I shot Jenna. I had to leave the job Liv. I couldn't do it any more, but I never meant to leave you. I…I loved you too much and in that moment when I thought she was going to shoot you, I chose you. My love for you destroyed a young woman and it destroyed me for a long time. My wife, my kids and you all paid for it in the end. Don found me at my lowest and he helped me pull my life back together. He got me this job and now he sent you here for a reason. You have to know that Liv. Please tell me there's a chance."

"What about Cassandra?"

"I never slept with her Liv. I've never been with anyone else besides Kathy…ever."

They were both trembling and he laid the necklace back, sliding his hand around to the back of her neck, tangling his fingers in her hair.

They had never stood like this before and it was too much and not enough at the same time.

Elliot slipped his other hand up to brush away the tears that were falling freely down Liv's face now. He leaned his forehead against hers and they both tried to catch their breath. They pulled back and Liv finally let go when she saw tears forming in his eyes too. She pressed into him as his hand slipped down to her waist pulling her closer. He held her like he was never going to let her go again.

All those years of dreaming about him holding her like this were nothing compared to this moment.

Her breath caught as Elliot slid his hand from behind her neck to cup her cheek and lift her face up to his. She closed her eyes as he brought his lips to hers and kissed her softly. It was like no kiss she had ever experienced in her life. For the first time they were free to express everything they felt for each other. He didn't press for more, but instead slowly explored her soft lips before he broke away and looked into her eyes.

"I've wanted to do that for so long Liv. I just didn't think I had the right. I didn't want to take you down with me. You deserve so much better than me."

"You idiot. Did you really think I'd ever want anyone but you?"

"You hid your feelings really well."

"You were my life El, not the job. In the beginning it was the job, but after a while it was about being with you. The job isn't the same without you there. I…I love you too Elliot, I just never thought you would feel the same way."

"Oh, God, if you only knew how much I dreamed about you…about us…wanting there to be an us."

"El, I…"

"I'm going to kiss you again. I'm just saying."

And this time the kiss was full of passion and want and promise and Olivia thought she was going to melt down into a puddle on the floor. She managed to pull herself together and remember that they were in a classroom. She pushed back and put both hands on his cheeks.

"I think we need to call it a night for now. We have a lot more talking to do and if you kiss me again I won't be responsible for my actions. This is a lot really fast after so many years."

Elliot was resting both hands at her waist and he pulled her close again bending to whisper in her ear.

"Can I walk you home?"

Liv smiled up at him.

"I'd love that."

Elliot gave her a quick peck on the lips and reached down for her hand. They had never held hands before. They laced fingers and leaned into each other as they traversed the halls to the dormitories.

When they arrived at her door Elliot stepped in front of her and wrapped her in his arms again.

"I'm never letting you go again Liv. If you're willing to take a chance on making this work, I promise to give you all of me: all the parts I held back all those years. Will you let me in?"

"I want to El. I've never wanted to let anyone in as badly as I do you."

The smile he gave her then split his face in half and he brought his hands up to her cheeks, kissing her one more time. He stepped back and ran his eyes over her face.

"Night Liv."

"Night El."

Liv watched as backed away from her down the hall. He stopped about midway down and waited for her to open her door.

"Sweet dreams."

"They will be now."

Nick was in his bunk staring at the ceiling as he waited for Olivia to get back. He was on pins and needles. Would he be holding a weeping woman or would she even be coming back to their room tonight?

He wasn't sure which scenario he was rooting for and then it hit him. He wanted her to be happy, really happy and if Stabler made her happy then she deserved to be with him. Nick couldn't offer her anything. He had a child and a marriage to salvage and dreaming of Olivia Benson wasn't going to get him any closer to his own happiness.

He rolled up on his side when he heard the door open and soft murmurings coming from the hall. Liv entered the room and closed the door, leaning against it and dropping her head back. Even in the darkened room he could see the smile on her face.

Looks like Stabler stepped up to the plate. Thank God. He lay back down and waited while she moved around the room and got ready for bed. He heard her sighing happily to herself. This girlie side of her was a revelation to him too. It was pretty cute.

She climbed into her bunk and he listened while she whispered to herself. He couldn't make out the words, but it sounded like she was replaying something. It must have been really good. She was giggling. He couldn't help himself.

"Hey, keep it down Benson. I'm tryin' to sleep here."

"Nick? You're still up?"

"I had to know you were okay Liv. You know, partners and all."

He heard her get out of her bunk and stand looking at him in the dark. He rolled on his side again and faced her.

"I take it that things went well."

"Very well."

"Good. I really didn't want to have to go beat his ass in my pajamas."

Olivia threw her head back and laughed the first purely joyful laugh he had ever heard her make. She reached up and patted his shoulder.

"Thanks for that Nick. I never thought I'd ever adjust to having a partner after El, but you've become not only a partner this year, but a friend. I know it hasn't been easy this year to be with me and I appreciate how you held in there. It means a lot."

"Well, your happiness means a lot to me too Liv and I like the smile I see and the giggling. For crying out loud. Who would ever imagine Bad Ass Benson giggled?"

"Yeah, well tell anybody and die Amaro."

"I like having secrets with you Liv. Now get some rest. The next nine weeks are going to be interesting."

"To say the least. Night Nick."

"Night Liv."


	6. Chapter 6

**Deep Running**

**Chapter Six**

**Zebraboymom**

**Disclaimer: They belong to me in my dreams only. **

**Author Notes: Elliot and Olivia explore their new relationship and hit some bumps along the way. Thing start to heat up between them. Nick helps Liv win the day during a very intense rivalry with Cassandra. **

Olivia woke up with a smile on her face. Her fingers went to her lips and she smiled as she remembered the kisses she had shared with Elliot the night before. She knew it hadn't been a dream, but she couldn't help but pinch herself. She rolled out of bed finally and stumbled to the shower. Noticing that Nick was long gone to the gym.

The man was as disciplined as Elliot. They were both gym rats. She had to admit she liked the results on both counts. They were both really good looking and had amazing bodies. If she hadn't already been in love with Elliot she could have easily fallen for Nick. Wouldn't that be a ridiculous repeat of history? You would think she would have learned from her mistakes, but then again, she could never think falling in love with El as a mistake.

Nick was becoming a great partner and friend and she liked him immensely, but she loved one strong, brooding man with gorgeous blue eyes. Hoping to catch him at breakfast before classes she jumped in the shower and hurriedly got dressed. Just as she was finishing her make-up, there was a knock on the door. She opened it to find Elliot wearing a deep blue shirt and smiling at her from ear to ear.

"Morning beautiful. Care to have breakfast with me?"

Liv just stood there taking him in. Her Elliot was talking to her like she was a woman, not a partner. It was…amazing.

"Don't tell me you skipped the gym."

"Nope. I got up a half hour earlier which was difficult given that I had a hard time going to sleep last night."

"Funny, I had the same problem."

"Yep. I couldn't stop thinking about this gorgeous brunette I happen to love."

Elliot looked around the hall and then pushed her back into the room, closing the door behind him. He pulled Liv to him and kissed her passionately. She opened to him and he deepened the kiss. It went on for a long time and Liv felt herself losing all coherent thought when he released her and nuzzled her with his nose.

"I wanted to give you a proper greeting."

"Yeah? Well you did…and then some. Let's go before Amaro comes back and sees something he has no right to witness."

"Okay, but I am taking you out tomorrow to Lunga Park. I own a canoe and we can have a picnic. I'd also like to take you to see my place off base. It's in Stafford, Virginia and sets on a river."

"Wait. I thought we had to stay at the training center on Sundays even though we're off."

"Ah, instructors have privileges and I already worked it out with my supervisor."

"Poor Nick. He'll be alone all day."

"So, you'd prefer to spend the day with your…partner?"

It was still hard to use that word with Liv and anyone else's name."

"I'll talk to him. I'd love to spend the day with you El. Now feed me."

They opened the door just as Nick started to use his key. He was sweating and immediately grinned at them.

"Hey, we better have a warning system if I'm gonna come to my room and find you two alone in it. Shall we use the sock method?"

Liv punched him in the shoulder as Elliot took her hand and led her from the room. He smiled at her and pretended he was hurt.

"Ouch. Watch it Benson."

"There will be no socks hung on doors."

"I'm just sayin' I would be scarred for life if I happened to you know…"

"Get dressed Amaro. We've got a big day ahead of us. All afternoon is field work with Stabler in charge."

Nick groaned and kicked the door shut behind them.

The two of them laughed all the way to the dining hall. One thing about Quantico, they knew how to feed their people. Every breakfast choice imaginable was available. They filled their trays and found a small table by the windows. Elliot tested the waters tentatively.

"So…last night was…"

"Best night of my life."

"No cold feet? No doubts? No over thinking it?"

"Watch it Stabler or I will."

"I'm just really happy Liv."

For a few moments they were lost in each other's eyes. It was still hard for either of them to get their arms around the change in their relationship. They were here, together and they had the freedom to just be a couple. It was a heady feeling.

"I'm gonna miss you all morning."

"I'll miss you too, but this afternoon should be fun."

"Tell me that after I'm done with you."

"What are we doing?"

"War games with paintball."

"No way."

"Yeah. The brass thinks it helps with morale and everybody has a lot of fun. It's good for shooting practice, stealth, team building and exercise."

"Nick is going to be beside himself. He and Fin do the paintball thing on the weekends sometimes."

"How is Fin?"

"Mad at you. That's for sure."

"I figured that. He's always been super protective of you and I know he's mad at me for just leaving and then ignoring all the calls from both of you."

"Did you really think I'd care if you were in a bad place El? I've seen you at your very worst and I handled it. Why didn't you let me in? Being on the outside was so much harder."

Elliot sat quietly for a minute.

"I didn't want you to see me like that, Liv. I was a horror story. I treated Kathy like crap and the kids got to where they were just afraid of me. The night Kathy kicked me out of the house she took out the divorce papers. She'd kept them all along. Told me she figured she'd need them someday. She just never thought she'd need them if I ever left the squad. She said she always thought it would be because I'd slept with you. Ironic, huh?"

"I never once gave her a reason to think I'd pursue you. I don't get it. I tried my best to keep you guys together. I knew you loved her and I just wanted you to be happy."

"You are the most amazing person. You know that? You always talked about your blood being bad, but Baby, you really did turn out great. You are nothing…nothing like your parents."

Elliot covered her hand with his and stroked his thumb across her wrist. They heard a throat clear and looked up to find Nick staring uncertainly at them.

"Uh, mind if I join you? I think I may have spoiled a moment there and I'm really sorry."

Liv looked at Elliot and mouthed the words 'thank you'. She flashed Nick a brilliant smile.

"Know you didn't. Eat quickly though. Our first class is your favorite."

"Don't remind me."

Elliot looked quizzical.

"Computers aren't exactly Nick's forte."

"Ah, mine either Amaro."

They watched as Nick inhaled his food and then split up for their various assignments.

Elliot winked at Liv.

"I'm gonna kick your butt this afternoon Benson."

"Maybe. Maybe not. Bring it on Stabler."

Nick looked confused as Liv pulled him along to class.

"Let's just say your weekends with Fin are really going to pay off this afternoon."

Nick grinned.

"Seriously?"

"Yep."

He almost danced a gig into the computer lab.

After lunch they were all loaded up into trucks and taken out to the woods nearby. The five teams were split up by parts of the country: East Coast, Midwest. Southern States, West Coast/Dessert States and the final team were the instructors.

Liv watched as Cassandra put on her gear and glared at her. She had a funny feeling she was going to be in her crosshairs for most of the afternoon.

Nick was thinking the same thing and he intended to watch Liv's back. They had spent every available moment talking and strategizing during the morning and at lunch.

Elliot came over to check Liv's equipment.

"You got her back Amaro?"

"Of course."

"Good, because I think Cass is out for blood."

"Yeah, I kinda picked up on that. If looks could kill, I'd already be dead."

"Just watch out. She plays all the time and she's good. I asked her to back off and she told me to go to hell. This is personal for her."

"And that's where I have the advantage. It isn't for me."

Elliot grinned and pushed her hair behind her ear.

"That's my girl."

The rules were simple. Get the flag of any other team from their fort and bring it to the judges' stand in the center of the open field surrounded by forest. Three shots to your vest and you're out of the game.

As soon as the whistle blew, they were off. Nick and Olivia stayed close together and skirted the playing area quickly. Liv looked back over her shoulder and saw Cassandra heading out after them. They split up as soon as they hit the trees and waited a few yards apart.

Liv thought she was well hidden until she felt a sharp sting in her upper shoulder. She was hit. Cassandra was standing about thirty feet from her. Olivia started to return fire when Cass ducked, but she was too late. Nick took her out with a full on shot to her chest.

The two took off while Cassandra stood stunned. They ran into a couple of guys from the West Coast team. It took about five minutes to out shoot them landing three hits to both, effectively taking them out of the game.

They reached the Southern States' team fort and were confronted by four men and women protecting it. They turned to find they had reinforcements and an all out battle began to take the fort flag. Olivia was so caught up in the game that she didn't hear Cassandra approach her from behind.

The woman stood up and with only about ten feet between them, she aimed at Olivia's head. This was against the rules and could hurt Olivia pretty bad from such a close range. The ugly smirk that appeared on the woman's face was wiped off when a strong hand grabbed the rifle out of her hands and she found herself on the ground looking up at a very angry Elliot.

Olivia spun around and saw Elliot and Cassandra.

"I still have your back Benson. Always will. Go get that flag. I got this."

Olivia blew him a kiss and took off after Amaro.

"You're in a lot of trouble Cass. You know the rules."

Elliot offered her a hand up off the ground.

"Go to hell Elliot."

They headed back to the judges' where Cass turned in her gun and left the game.

In the mean time Nick tossed Olivia the flag and the rest of their team made it back through the gunfire to the judges.

Elliot was leaning against the stand grinning from ear to ear.

"Way to go Benson."

Liv blushed and shoved Nick who was walking beside her.

"Couldn't have done it without my partner…both my partners."

**A/N: Next up, the Sunday Date. **


	7. Chapter 7

**Deep Running**

**Chapter Seven**

**Zebraboymom**

**Disclaimer: They belong to me in my dreams only. **

**Author Notes: Elliot and Olivia go on their date and talk about what happened.**

Liv watched the scene unfold before her and smiled. Elliot and Nick had both teased her mercilessly and it felt like she had spent the day with her boyfriend and her brother. The rest of their team gave Nick and Olivia a victory lap around the grounds, but Liv couldn't keep her eyes off the trouble brewing with a certain blonde who was arguing with one of the judges and Elliot off to the side.

Eventually Cassandra kicked the ground with her foot and stomped off to a waiting jeep. She tore out of the parking lot and down the dirt road back to the base. Liv knew she was furious. Elliot strode back over with his hands on his hips and a huge grin on his face.

"Problem solved, for now."

He sat next to Liv on the way back in the truck and told her Cassandra was suspended from the paintball games indefinitely for endangering a trainee.

Olivia's eyes went wide.

"She's really going to hate me now."

"Don't worry about it. She made the choice. She knows the consequences."

They all clambered down and went to clean up. Nick chuckled as Liv came in from the bathroom drying her hair with the towel. As he headed in for his shower he grinned.

"Man that woman does not like you Benson."

"She's kind of scary."

"Don't worry about it. Stabler and I have your back. You know that. Right?"

"Yeah. I do."

"Listen Nick about tomorrow…"

"It's okay. Elliot already talked to me and asked my permission sort of. It was nice of him to take my feelings into account, but it's totally okay. I'm not smart like you and I have tons of homework. I also need to have a long video talk with my little Zara and with Maria. It'll be easier if you aren't here, so go and have fun. It makes me happy to see you so happy."

"Nick, you are too nice. What did I do to deserve such a great partner?"

"Are you flirting with me Detective?"

Olivia smiled and laughed, remembering the teasing she had done of him earlier.

"Hurry up. I'm hungry. You get five minutes in the shower and then we're eating pizza until we puke."

"We did good today didn't we?"

"Yeah. We did good."

They met up with Elliot a half hour later and spent the rest of the night telling Nick about some of their more harrowing cases. Elliot eyes twinkled as he told stories of Liv crossing the line and she gave it back to him just as bad, reminding him of his nickname Unstabler.

Nick laughed and shook his head.

"Man, I wish I could have watched you two in the day. I could have learned a lot."

"We learned as we went. You'll do the same."

"He already has great instincts El. You should see him. We work pretty good in the interview room together."

"Well, we're no Stabler and Benson, but I think we do okay. I'm the nice one. She's the bad cop."

"Hey!"

Liv punched him hard in the arm and he feigned injury.

Elliot leaned back and drank his beer grinning from ear to ear. He really liked this guy a lot and felt so much better knowing he had Liv's back.

It was getting late and Nick wanted them to have some time to say goodnight without his presence.

"I'm gonna call it a night. I need to say goodnight to my baby girl. Night Liv. Night Elliot."

The two men shook hands. Once he was out of hearing, Elliot turned to her.

"So, are you ready for our date tomorrow young lady?"

"Now that's something I thought I would never hear come out of your mouth. A date. We are actually going on a real date."

Elliot reached across the table and took her hand in his.

"I can't wait Liv. I've thought so much about what that might look like. How early can you be ready? I'd like to start by taking you out to breakfast."

"How's eight o'clock sound?"

"Not early enough, but I'll be okay. Come on and I'll walk you to your room."

They walked along holding hands and smiling. When they reached her room, Elliot cupped her cheek and kissed her softly.

"I like doing that."

"Me too. See you in the morning."

"You better believe it."

Liv went to bed with her stomach fluttering in anticipation.

The next morning she was a flurry of activity getting ready.

Nick watched her crazy behavior from his bunk and grinned from ear to ear.

"Relax Liv. You've known the guy forever. It's going to be fine."

"I know…it's just…"

"Never like this."

"Yeah…"

"He loves you Liv. There's nothing to be afraid of. Just don't run."

"I won't."

"Don't be afraid of the emotion. You run when you get in deep."

"You are starting to know me a little too well Amaro."

"Yeah, it's my job. You can thank me later."

Liv took her pillow off her bunk and started beating him with it.

It was exactly eight o'clock and there was a knock on the door. Liv dropped the pillow and looked stricken.

"Answer the door Liv. He won't bite."

He watched as she recovered and went to the door.

"Hey Nick."

"Hey Elliot. You guys have fun. Get her to relax will ya?"

"I hope I can. See you tonight."

"Yeah, right. If I'm still up."

He winked at Liv and chuckled as they closed the door behind them.

Once they were outside, Elliot walked her to a jeep with his hand placed possessively on her lower back. They headed out and were off base in a short time. Elliot pulled into the S and G Restaurant and led Liv inside. It was obviously one of his favorite places and everybody seemed to know him. A dark haired guy with an infectious smile approached them. He wore a big red apron.

"Hey Elliot where'd a guy like you find such a beauty?"

"Liv, this is Sal, the owner of this establishment."

"Sal, this is Liv."

"The Liv?"

"Yep."

"What does he mean, 'The Liv'?"

"Your partner here has spent many an hour in here. He eats and talks and I listen."

Liv looked at Elliot and then at the owner.

"You got Elliot Stabler to open up to you? What? Were you a bartender before you went into the restaurant business?"

"We just hit it off. I take it that it's a good thing she's here with you Elliot."

"A very good thing."

The man grabbed Liv in a huge hug.

"What's your favorite pancake Honey? I'm gonna cook 'em myself. I like the smile you put on this guy's mug."

Liv liked this guy a lot.

"Choc…"

"…olate chip. I knew it. Whipped cream on top?"

"Oh, now you're talking."

Elliot guided Liv to what she could only assumed was "his" booth. He was smiling at her across the table as leaning on his crossed arms.

"I promised Sal if I ever…you know, had a chance with you again, I'd bring you here."

"El, I had no idea you missed me like that. If I'd known…"

"It wasn't the right time LIv. I needed to rebuild my life first. Now is the right time to start over. That is if you want to start over."

"I don't know about starting over El. I'd say take up where we left off with new and exciting information."

His eyes sparkled at her as he chuckled.

"Yeah, I see your point."

The pancakes were incredible, but four the size of a dinner plate was a bit much for Liv. Sal just laughed and told her to eat what she could. He slid into the booth next to Elliot as he ate his pecan pancakes and looked Liv up and down.

"You are a beautiful woman Olivia Benson. No wonder this big lug couldn't get over you. He would sit here some nights and I could feel the pining all the way in the kitchen. It was awful."

Elliot looked up at LIv shyly. Now LIv was blushing.

"It's nice to know I could make him pine."

"So, will we be seeing more of you Detective Benson?"

"She's here for the ten week training program."

"Lucky you. How'd that work?"

"We think her Captain was playing cupid."

"I'd like to meet that guy. He sounds like a smart man. So what happens when the training ends? You live five hours from each other now. How's that work?"

Boy, Sal didn't mince any words.

"Yeah, El. How's that work?"

"Come on Sal, we haven't even talked about it yet. We're just a week into the reunion."

"Ah, okay, I'll back off. Understood. Now get out of here and have a fun day. It's on me."

They laughed and slid out of the booth. Sal grabbed her up off her feet in a big hug and then they were out the door. She liked the man and the place. It was nice to see Elliot with friends.

The next stop was the deli he had been telling her about. They got sandwiches, huge kosher pickles, chips, brownies and beer. After that they went to Elliot's house to get his canoe.

As they drove up to Elliot's house, Liv blinked at the sunlight filtering through the trees that lined the long winding driveway. The house was beautiful on the outside and had a huge lawn that ran up to woods. What a perfect place for kids to explore. She bet Eli loved it.

"Man El, how can you afford this?"

"Well, the kids are all eighteen, so the only child support is Eli and Kathy is engaged to some doctor she met, so she doesn't want alimony anymore."

"Wow! She moved on fast."

"Not really. I think she moved on a few years ago. We both did. It's funny because now I can actually afford to help her out and give her a better life. I make almost twice what my salary as a detective was, but I'm sure the good doctor can offer a lot more than that."

"Where do I sign up?"

Elliot laughed. He backed up to the garage and parked before he lifted the door and drove an SUV out with a canoe strapped on top.

"Come on. Let's hit the lake and when we get back later I'll take you on a tour of the house and make dinner here."

The rest of the morning was a dream. They put the canoe in the most beautiful lake she had ever seen. Liv had never been in a canoe before and she was uncertain, but Elliot told her to just sit facing him and he'd paddle them around. He pushed the canoe off the shore and hopped in, taking them far out into the lake.

Watching Elliot paddle, with the muscles of his arm rippling, made Olivia a little weak in the knees, but she had never been allowed to be with him like this. It was emotionally overwhelming. When they were in about the middle of the lake he stopped paddling and they just sat watching ducks landing in the water and the light bouncing off the ripples made by the boat.

"El, this is so beautiful. I…I've never had a chance to just enjoy nature like this. It's almost…"

"Spiritual?"

"Yeah, I think so. I am such a city girl. It's pathetic."

"I like you just the way you are Liv and I like that I can surprise you and give you an experience you've never had."

"You know, when I saw you in that hallway I never thought we'd end up here together. I was ready to just hate you on an even deeper level than I already did."

Elliot's eyes started to get moist and he swallowed hard.

"You hated me?"

"I…tried to. It was much easier than crying every day. I had to be able to work. Can you tell me what happened?"

"You want details?"

"A few would help me to understand why you never called or anything. When I got the necklace and the badge clip I knew you still cared, but I was so confused as to why you cut me off completely. I just couldn't imagine anything except maybe you blamed me."

"Okay. First, I never blamed you. I'm so sorry I made you feel that way. I loved you and I took myself out of your life so I wouldn't hurt you. I didn't think about what that would really mean to you. I just…"

"Please tell me."

"I was a mess. I slept most of the day and at night I drank. I did anything I could to push away the memory of her face as she died in my arms. It was…I was…destroyed. You know I'd never hurt a child. I didn't kill the boy in the Gitano case and eventually I was able to get over that, but I shot Jenna with my own gun. I couldn't get it out of my head."

"I'm sorry."

"Kathy begged me to get help and eventually she made me move downstairs into the guest bedroom. One night I came home drunk and I said some vile things to her in front of Eli. I yelled at him when he tried to defend her. My own little boy who was only a few years old was trying to protect his mom from me. She threw me out and I ended up knocking on Don's door that night. I had nowhere else to go."

"You stayed with Don? He never told me any of this."

"I made him promise not to. He helped me get off the booze. He helped me to see what it would eventually do to me and took me to some AA meetings with him. He got me to start seeing George and then helped me get an interview with Quantico. They wanted me and I moved on the base for a while until I got my head and my finances together. Kathy had the divorce papers ready to sign a month after I moved out. She was so ready to be rid of me."

"How are things between you now?"

"They're good. She actually says she likes this Elliot. If she weren't getting married, she'd date me. Ha. It took Eli a long time to forgive me, but we're doing really well now."

"El, why didn't you come and find me when you were better?"

"You'll laugh. I was afraid of you. I was afraid of the disappointment I'd see in your eyes after you tried for so long to help me keep my marriage together. You'd hate that I had become a drunk like you're mom…that I hurt my kids. I totally screwed up my life Liv and I just…I never wanted you to see me that weak. I know it's stupid and arrogant, but I always saw myself as your knight, your protector."

"Same old Elliot in some ways."

"Huh?"

"You always fought to hide the emotions. I always knew when you were hurting, but most of the time you covered it up. What you don't know is that I could never hate you. I would never judge you and you have been my protector for more years than I even care to count. I would have been there through it all you know."

Liv brushed some angry tears away and Elliot reached for her hand, bringing it to his lips and kissing it.

"I know that now. Will you forgive me Liv?"

"You don't ever have to ask that question El. I do and I always will. It's what makes us…us."

**A/N: Okay, so the date is going long. Dinner will be the next chapter.**


	8. Chapter 8

**Deep Running**

**Chapter Eight**

**Zebraboymom**

**Disclaimer: They belong to me in my dreams only. **

**Author Notes: Hey guys. I just want to give a shout out to folks who were hoping this was going to be a Nick and Olivia hook up. I said at the outset this was to be an E/O story ultimately. All my stories ship them. Sorry guys. You'll have to check the site and select stories that specifically ship Nick and Olivia or start writing your own and start a following. So now back to the story. Elliot and Olivia continue their date and Nick has a conversation with Cassandra and his wife. **

Elliot paddled back to shore and grabbed the picnic basket they had put the deli food in from the SUV. He brought a beautiful plaid blanket and they spread it out on the ground.

The food was great and afterwards they lay on their sides facing each other each resting on an elbow. Elliot reached up and pushed Liv's hair behind her shoulder.

"I like your hair long. It suits you. It makes you look…"

"More like a girl and less like a boy?"

"Liv, you have never looked like a boy in your entire life. You were never just one of the guys. You look beautiful today and I…I really want to kiss you."

"Well, don't let me stop you."

"I just didn't know what the protocol was for a first date. A goodnight kiss at the door?"

"I think we blew past that one the other night."

Elliot grinned and reached his arm across Liv's waist.

"Come her you."

Elliot's lips captured hers and they snuggled into each other deepening the kiss just as Elliot's cell phone went off.

"Let's ignore it."

"What if it's one of your kids?"

Liv groaned and laid down on the blanket on her back as Elliot looked at his phone and mouthed the name Don to Liv.

"Hey Don. What's up?"

"How are things going Elliot? Have you seen Liv yet?"

"Yeah about that Don. Thanks for the heads up. We both got the shock of our lives."

"How'd Liv take it?"

"I'll let you talk to her. She's right here."

Liv sat up and the first thing she did was to let Don have it.

"What the hell Don? You didn't think it might have been a good idea to tell me you'd been nurse maiding Elliot while I was falling apart? And now you just send me here without a heads up? Why Don?"

"Because I know you Liv and I know that if I'd told you, you wouldn't have gone. I take it since you're with him, you've talked?"

"Let's just say we are talking about everything and leave it at that."

"I only did this because I know you both so well. And I knew one or both of you would run. I had to put you in a situation where you were stuck together and couldn't just hop in a car and leave."

"Well, I want you to know that although I'm furious with you. I love you for it as well. I think we've figured a few things out and we're going to figure a lot more out."

"Am I going to lose a good detective?"

"It's a little too early to tell right now."

"Okay, where are you right now?"

"Sitting on a blanket by a beautiful lake having a picnic."

"I'm glad to hear that. Have fun you two."

On his end, Don was grinning from ear to ear.

Nick sat down at a table for lunch and pulled out his textbook on Labor Law issues. Why he needed to learn this stuff as a detective he would never know. It's not like he had any aspirations to make captain. There were four people ahead of him and he liked it on the streets, not sitting behind a desk.

He was just going over the main points of yet another law when a woman cleared her throat. Nick looked up. It was Cassandra. It took all he had not to groan.

"Agent Mead."

"Detective Amaro. Right?"

Nick thought "as if you didn't know'.

"Uh, yeah."

"Can I sit down? I can help you with that."

She pointed to the book and smiled. It felt so condescending Nick almost puked.

"I think I…"

Cassandra sat down.

"Do you understand the law you're looking at?"

"Not really. Okay, let's look at the groups of laws and it will help you organize them all."

Half an hour later Nick looked up surprised that he had his arms around the current set of laws he was supposed to study. This gal was sharp. He had to give her that.

"Thanks. That was…"

"Don't feel bad. I struggled with this stuff in the beginning too."

"You didn't have to help me and after yesterday, I didn't expect you to."

"I was just mad. I hate to lose and she's competition. Trouble is I never had a chance did I?"

"No. Apparently they've had a thing for each other for a long time."

"How long?"

"Over a decade."

"Wow! I've only known him a few months. We didn't even start to date regularly until a few weeks ago."

"They have a history you'd never be able to compete with."

"What's your relationship with her?"

"We're just partners. I like her, but I'm married and she's obviously spoken for. So, we're friends and partners and I like working with her. She's had my back on more than one occasion."

"She's lucky to have someone like you in her life. Tell her I'm sorry for what I did and I hope she and Elliot work things out."

"I will."

Nick's computer chose that moment to signal him he had a call from his wife. He excused himself and headed to his room, answering it as he went.

"Hey Babe."

"Hi Sweetheart. How's Boot Camp?"

"Very funny soldier."

"So, how's the training really?"

"I'm learning a lot actually."

"How's Olivia?"

"Truth? It's been a bit crazy here. Her ex-partner is a teacher here and well, let's just say sparks flew when they saw each other again."

"They had a thing for each other?"

"Pretty much."

"You think that happens a lot with partners? You spend so much time with someone you get close and…"

"Yeah, well I'm taken and so is she so we're just good friends. She's like a sister to me. I have a beautiful wife that I am missin' so much, especially since Liv is out having a romantic date with Stabler and I can only see you on this tiny screen. I miss you Maria with all my heart and I know things haven't been so good between us lately, but I want it to be."

"Me too. I love you. I wish I could kiss you goodnight."

"I wish I could do more than that with you tonight."

"Are you flirting with me?"

"Damn straight I am."

Nick settled in and enjoyed his time with Maria leaving thoughts of Olivia and Elliot behind.

After lunch they took a walk around the lake and Elliot took Olivia's hand in his as they made their way along the walking path. They passed families and teenagers and elderly couples all enjoying the lake. Liv was captivated by it. People actually lived this way? They found a bench and sat for a bit to people watch. It was fun; they decided to make up stories for the different folks.

Elliot pointed to an older couple that was wrapped around each other and wearing matching jogging suits.

"They were international spies that fell in love and quit the business. They wanted to be together so they've been hiding out here in the suburbs."

"Wow, El! I was just going to say they looked like they'd been married their whole life. Where do you get that stuff? You have a very active imagination."

Elliot looked over at her and ran his eyes up and down her body.

"You have no idea."

"We're out in public Stabler. Keep it PG."

"We could head to my house."

"I'd like to see where you live."

"Let's go then."

It didn't take long to get back to Elliot's place and as she stood in the living room she liked what she saw. He had made it really homey. The downstairs was a big open space with kitchen, dining and living room all together. She could see him spending time there with his kids. There was a huge TV and more than one video game console. She bet the Stabler competitions there were epic.

"Do the kids come down much?"

"What do you think?"

"How long did it take to get them to forgive you?"

"Too long."

"I like this room. It's a perfect family room."

Elliot showed her the back yard. They walked out on a huge deck with a gigantic grill. There was a large backyard that would be great for football games and a small stream ran behind the house through the woods. It was a perfect setting for kids.

"Elliot, it's lovely here. I…I'm glad you have a place like this."

"Come on, you haven't seen upstairs yet."

They climbed a wide staircase up to the second level. There were bedrooms all along the hall and at the end there was a master suite. Liv opened the double doors and stood stock still taking it all in. There was a fireplace just like downstairs and a huge California King bed in the middle of the room. The bathroom had a huge double size walk in shower and a Jacuzzi. It was a dreamy room. How could you not rest in a room this comfortable? Before she knew what she was saying the words were out of her mouth?

"Can we take a nap before dinner?"

Elliot smiled at her. He was hoping she'd ask.

"Absolutely. I've dreamed of having you here with me in this room."

They never broke eye contact as they kicked off their shoes and met on their knees in the middle of his bed. Elliot slid his arm slowly around Liv's waist and pulled her close. They looked into each other's eyes and Elliot nuzzled her nose with his before he unceremoniously tossed her down on the bed and fell back beside her. They giggled for a few seconds and then turned on their sides, facing each other.

"Does this feel as unreal to you as it does to me?"

Elliot grinned at her and reached for her hands, bringing them between them and kissing her knuckles.

"You have no idea how unexpected this had been for me. Liv, I just want to be with you however you let me. I want you in my life. I spent the last decade with you and I want to spend the next decade learning all the things about you I never got to know. The idea of just lying here with you in my arms is enough for now."

Elliot dropped her hands, rolled on his back and reached to pull her over onto his chest part way.

"Sleep Liv and tonight I'll grill steaks out on the grill."

Olivia cuddled up to El and threw her arm over his waist. She sighed as she snuggled down in his arms and felt his fingers combing through her hair. It was heaven. The soft sound of birds outside the window put her to sleep and as she drifted off she thought briefly that there was no other place in the world she would rather be.

**A/N: Okay so one more chapter for this date.**


	9. Chapter 9

**Deep Running**

**Chapter Nine**

**Zebraboymom**

**Disclaimer: They belong to me in my dreams only. **

**Author Notes: The evening gets going and the steaks grilling on the grill aren't the only things heating up. One date down and nine to go.**

Liv woke up with a pair of strong arms wrapped around her and the male scent of Elliot Stabler filling her senses. Was she dreaming? She marveled at the fact that they were doing something so domestic as to take a nap on a Sunday afternoon. She looked up to find a pair of blue eyes smiling down at her.

"How long have you been awake?"

"Not long. I like watching you sleep."

"Why?"

"I used to sit and watch you sometimes in the cribs before I woke you up. The worries of the world sort of fall away and you look content. "

"I think I'm content because I'm sleeping with you."

"Reeeeally."

"The only bad part is I feel like I wasted time sleeping that I could have been spending with you talking."

"I liked sleeping with you LIv. There were so many times over the years when I wanted to climb onto the cot you were sleeping on in the crib and wrap my arms around you. There were times when I knew you were crying because you'd sleep with your back to me."

"You knew?"

"I always knew Liv. I knew when you were tired or angry or frustrated. I could read every emotion even though you tried to hide them from me. Why didn't you open up and talk to me?"

"You really want to know?"

"Yeah. I do."

"It was what you said that day in the hall during the Gitano case about always having look over your shoulder and see I was okay. You needed to know I could do my job without you always coming to the rescue. After that I didn't think I could ever let you see me weak again. I was afraid if I did…"

"Liv?"

Her voice broke on the next words

"…if I did, you'd ask for another partner. I didn't want to lose you."

"Oh, Liv, I'm sorry. I was just so scared that day. I came face to face with my deepest feelings for you that day and I thought I was going to lose you. That's the day I realized I was in love with you."

"Then why…?"

"Did I push you away? I was scared. What would a beautiful young woman like you want with a divorced SOB, father of four like me? I hadn't been separated that long and it's not like I'd ever dated before."

"Are you kidding? You are the only man who has mattered in my life for so long. You're the only one I wanted to be with. You're it for me El."

Elliot's lips came crashing down on hers as he expressed what he couldn't find the words to say. She was everything to him too and he couldn't believe he almost lost her forever. When they both needed to catch their breath he pulled back and looked into her brown eyes.

Liv's eyes swam with tears at the emotion she saw in his.

"You're it for me too Liv. Even though I've made a life here and it's a good one, it was missing the one person that I really needed. I need you Liv. I need you like air."

The smiles that they gave each other lit up the room and their lips met again.

"I could stay right here in my bed with you for another week."

"I could almost go for that."

"But…"

"I do have one request though."

"And that is…"

"Feed me."

Elliot grinned at her and rolled over on top of her. He pressed himself to her for the briefest moment and Liv gasped before he rolled off her and out of the bed.

"Oh, that was just mean."

A pillow sailed past Elliot's head as he reached to the door.

"Just giving you a preview of things to come."

And then he was out the door with Liv in hot pursuit of him. They clambered down the stairs and Elliot turned just as she reached the bottom and caught her in his arms. Their eyes were fixed on each other as they laughed.

"I never thought touching you would be so easy. All those years…"

"We can make up for it now El."

"Yes, yes we can. Olivia Benson will you agree to nine more dates in the nine more weeks of training you have?"

"Why yes, I think I would love to go out with you again and again and again and…well you get my drift."

Elliot slipped his arms around her waist and lifted her down off the last step, planting a soft kiss on her lips and setting her down to brush her hair back from her face. His eyes softened as he took in her breathless appearance. He wanted to make her breathless for the rest of her life. He just had to make sure she didn't run when he told her how he felt. He wanted her to stay.

Dinner was fun. Elliot marinated a couple of rib eyes and then showed Liv how to cut up potatoes and put them in foil. They dropped them on the grill while the steaks cooked and had roasted potatoes and salad with them.

Olivia leaned back in her chair and warmed her face in the evening sun. The view here was so peaceful. It made the city and the things they had to deal with every day seem so far away. She could feel parts of her healing just being in such a beautiful place.

She captivated Elliot as she stretched out like a cat and sunbathed in her chair. He had never seen her so relaxed and it made him really, really happy.

"So tell me more about Amaro. It sounds like you trust him a lot. I have to say Liv I'm jealous that you're so close. You seem comfortable touching each other, teasing each other and talking with each other."

"What seems so strange to you? You and I were like that in the early days of our partnership before everything got so complicated. The difference with our partnership is that Nick is connected to his emotions. He doesn't hide them. They're right there out front. I don't have to play guessing games with him. He's not this brooding time bomb that can go off at any moment."

"That's how you saw me?"

"Are you kidding? The last six years we were together you were wound up like a top most of the time. There was so much anger there. I didn't know what to do some times. When you weren't mad, you were brooding. It was hell when we caught a difficult case."

Elliot sighed and scrubbed his hand down his face. He knew he had been hard on her. He had never looked at it through her eyes. He was a bastard.

"I'm a selfish prick Liv. I just never saw it through your eyes. How could I have been so stupid?"

"You had your own private war going on at home El. That had to be hard."

"It's no excuse, but I did care about you Liv. I cared a lot. That day after the boy…I went to see George. I wanted to blame you because I cared too much. He helped me to see that it wasn't your fault and that I made the decision because of how I felt about you. You never made me do anything, but I wanted to blame you, just like I wanted to blame Kathy and my mother and my father and having to get married and so many other people and things in my life. Now, I'm taking that back. I stand by my decisions and nobody makes me do anything anymore. I hope you can see that when you're with me."

"I do Elliot. I see a very different guy from the one I knew, but you're still the same too. You care so much about everyone and you try so hard to make everybody else happy that you never found any for yourself. I think you have now. You move differently and talk differently. There's no walls, no guards up. It's nice."

"Nice huh?"

Elliot got out of his chair and sauntered over to her. He pulled her out of her chair into his arms and held her against his body.

"Yeah. Nice. I like the guy I found on the other side of that wall."

"You feel so good in my arms Liv. This time with us is like a gift. I never thought in a million years we'd be standing on a deck in the suburbs wrapped up in each other's arms. I hate we have to end this, but we both have to be back at the base by eight o'clock."

"Then we better get these dishes done and get on the road. My roommate will be wondering about me."

An hour later they were walking down the hall to Liv's room. Elliot had his arm around her shoulders and Olivia had hers around his waist. As they rounded a corner, one of Elliot's superiors stopped them.

"Elliot, who's the young lady you're so wrapped up in?"

"Agent Bob Nichols, this is Detective Olivia Benson, my ex-partner and the most important person in my life."

"Wow, this is the Olivia you talk so much about? It's a pleasure to meet you."

"Thank you. It's really nice to be here. I'm enjoying the training and Elliot is a wonderful added bonus."

"So, you weren't expecting to see each other?"

"Not exactly, but it's been great catching up."

The man's eyebrows went up and he smiled at them. They had love written all over their faces.

"Well, that's great to hear. I'll look forward to seeing you more as the weeks go along. Better get her to her room Stabler. Week Two takes things up a notch. Take care now."

They reached Liv's door a few minutes later.

"What did he mean El?"

"I can't tell you. It's a secret and well if I did, I'd have to kill ya. Let's just say, you'll need your rest."

He teased.

When they reached her room Elliot backed her up against the door and slipped his arms around her waist. He kissed her deeply and LIv's head fell back against the door. They giggled as she rubbed her head and they could hear Nick on the other side.

"I can hear you out there. Kiss her goodnight Stabler and go to bed."

"Night Amaro."

With that, Elliot took Liv into his arms one more time and kissed her softly.

"Night Liv. I'll miss you."

"I'll miss you too El."

The voice on the other side of the door made them both giggle again.

"Yeah. Yeah. I'll miss you too Stabler."

Liv opened the door and they gave each other one last kiss before she shut it behind her and grinned at Nick.

"You really know how to kill a moment. You know that?"

He grinned from ear to ear.

"Yep. I do."


	10. Chapter 10

**Deep Running**

**Chapter Ten**

**Zebraboymom**

**Disclaimer: They belong to me in my dreams only. **

**Author Notes: Elliot has some company coming. How will Liv react and will Nick help out?**

On Monday morning, Liv woke up and stretched. She could already hear Nick in the shower and so she relaxed in her bunk and thought about the progress she and Elliot had made together over the weekend. Elliot was different now. She could see the positive changes in him. This life he had now agreed with him, but how did she fit into it? How would they make a long distance relationship work? It was a five-hour commute. She couldn't just come home at night to him…that is if he wanted long term with her. She thought he did, but they had yet to really discuss things. It had only been a week. Was she jumping the gun?

Nick stood in the bathroom door and watched Liv tossing in her bunk. He knew that behavior. He had seen it on more than one occasion. Whenever she was over thinking things she got restless.

"You need to stop Liv. Taking yourself down too many paths too soon will derail you and you know it."

Liv opened her eyes and stared at the other man in her life. He knew her so well. How could she ever think about breaking up their partnership…leaving New York…quitting SVU? That's exactly what she had been thinking.

"Get out of my head Amaro."

He grinned at her.

"I'm an interrogator, remember? Besides, I can read you like a book these days Liv. Bein' here with Stabler has agreed with you. The walls aren't so high anymore. I've wondered for this whole year what it would take to get you to drop them just a little bit. Instead it's like the Battle of Jericho. The walls are tumblin' down. Don't start puttin' 'em back up now."

"I just…"

"You're scared. I get it. You don't let people get close very often. I for one feel very privileged that you let me in. It means a lot Liv."

Olivia started to get really embarrassed and hopped out of bed.

"I gotta get a shower before we hit the food. Did you see Elliot at the gym?"

"I did. The guy had a smile on his face the whole time. Just exactly what did said date include yesterday?"

"Oh, no you don't. I am not sharing date details with my partner. I will tell you this. I slept with him."

The look on Nick's face was priceless, before it morphed into anger.

"What the hell, LIv? What happened to taking things slow?"

As she skipped past him with her clothes she grinned and laughed.

"We took a nap and then made dinner."

She watched his face as she giggled and shut the door.

"You are too easy sometimes Amaro."

Nick sat down at his desk and shook his head. The woman was going to be the death of him.

The week went along smoothly and Nick was starting to get back into learning mode. The homework came easier and Liv helped him when he didn't understand something. She was really smart and never seemed to have to study.

The three of them shared meals together and went to the shooting range several times together. They were all three competitive and the comparing of shots was hilarious at times. The irony was Liv beat both men on a regular basis. Was there anything the woman could not do well?

Friday evening Elliot asked Liv to take a walk with him. They found a spot on the bleachers around the running track and sat down.

"Okay, talk. Something has been on your mind all day and I know it's bothering you, so out with it."

"About this weekend…"

Liv's heart sank. She had thought things were going well with them. Maybe she had been wrong.

"You want to cancel."

"What? No! Are you kidding? I've been waiting all week to spend time with you. It's just…"

"Elliot, tell me."

"Eli wanted to come see me this weekend and Maureen volunteered to bring him. They're driving up Saturday morning and staying until Sunday night."

"Oh. It's okay El. I can spend the weekend with Nick. Go and have a good time with you oldest and youngest."

"No Liv. You don't get it. I want you to come with me. I just wanted you to know it will be a lot different than last time."

"How do you think Maureen will feel about me being there?"

"I think she'll be more than okay with it Liv. I already told her you were here. One thing I'd like to do is invite Nick along too. The guy is great at relieving tension and it could make it more fun if there are four of us instead of her feeling like the third wheel so to speak. Do you think he'd do it?"

"If it meant getting off the base for a bit, I think he'd love it."

"Okay, then it's a plan."

"How old is Maureen now?"

"Twenty-eight. Can you believe it? She was fifteen when we became partners, remember?"

"I do. Is she seeing anyone?"

"Nope. She just got a job in the D.A.'s office and she's all about the job. It scares me how much she's like me. She had a serious boyfriend for a couple of years, but she said no when he asked her to marry him. She said he was too immature. She's old for her age."

"Wow! Maureen's a lawyer. Who'd have thought? Aren't you the proud papa?"

"At least she wants to put away the bad guys."

"How does she feel about us coming? I hope she doesn't feel like I'm ruining her time with you."

"She doesn't. She…uh kind of knows how I feel about you."

"She does?"

"Yeah, we talk a lot. Ever since the divorce she's been encouraging me to get in contact with you, but…"

"It's okay El, I know."

That night when Elliot walked Liv to her room he came inside.

"So, Nick. How would you like to get away from this place for a bit?"

"You can make that happen?"

"Yeah, I was hoping you and Liv could come to my place Saturday night when training ends and stay through Sunday evening."

"Why would you and Liv want me along on your only alone time?"

"My eldest daughter and my youngest son are coming in the morning to spend the weekend. It would be fun to have more people there and I think it would make everyone feel more comfortable if there was a group."

Nick looked at Liv to get a read on what she wanted him to do. She was almost pleading with her eyes. Looked like she wanted him to run interference for her. She looked nervous about it.

"Okay, sure. I'd like to see somethin' besides these four walls and to sleep in somethin' besides a bunk bed would be a pleasant change. I'd love to."

Liv let out the breath she didn't realize she'd been holding and smiled at Elliot and Nick.

Elliot pulled her into a hug and kissed her quickly before he left. Nick smiled to himself. It was funny to see the two of them be shy about their relationship. No wonder they took so long to get together.

Sunday after the last field training exercise they cleaned up and packed overnight bags. Elliot told them Maureen was going to have dinner ready for them when they got there.

Nick watched with interest as they drove off the main street up a winding road lined with the most beautiful trees.

As they reached the house itself he saw a huge front lawn with a little boy tumbling down the grass under the watchful eye of a beautiful young woman he supposed must be Maureen. She was really pretty and had an air of confidence to her as she strode over to the car to meet them.

She reached for Liv's door and opened it.

"Liv, it's so great to see you."

The two women went into a hug as the little boy threw himself into Elliot's arms.

"Daddy!"

Elliot swung him high in the air and Nick felt a sudden pang in his heart for his little Zara who was less than a year older than this curly-haired boy.

"Livvy!"

Eli reached towards Liv who promptly pulled him out of Elliot's arms and held him close. Liv had told Nick the story about how she watched him be delivered and was the first one to hold him. It was obvious they had a special bond.

"Hi, I'm Maureen. You must be Nick."

Maureen reached out to Nick and he took her warm hand in his.

"And you're Maureen. Accordin' to your dad, you're a caped crusader. I think it's great you like to put away the perps we find for you."

Maureen laughed and blushed.

"My dad is a little too proud of me sometimes."

"Nah. You can never be too proud of your kid. I have a little girl, Zara, and I think everythin' she does is amazin'. It's a dad thing."

Everyone laughed and headed into the house.

"Dad, I have chicken ready to go on the grill, if you or Nick will man it. Everything else is almost ready. I just need to put the salad together."

Elliot slipped his arm around her waist and kissed her temple.

"You know you didn't have to do all this. You came to visit me, not wait on me. We could have eaten out."

"I like getting to spoil you a little bit Dad. I don't get to very often. So, Liv, you want to help me in the kitchen while the guys start on the grilling?"

"Sure."

The two men took the platter Maureen handed them along with some BBQ sauce and went outside on the deck followed by Eli who had a bright red ball in his hand. He was eager to play catch.

Maureen pulled the salad bowl out and the two women stood shoulder-to-shoulder watching the men out the kitchen window. They cut the now dry lettuce and other greens up.

"You look great Liv. I've really missed seeing you. There was a time when I thought I'd never see you again. Dad was adamant that you were not to know anything. He blamed himself for everything for so long and he was in a really bad place for a long time. He pushed us all away. It was hard Liv. I was angry for a long time with him, but he's come so far. Uncle Don really made a difference in his life and now with you here…I have to tell you I've never seen him look so happy. He told me he finally told you how he feels."

"Maureen are you really okay with the idea of your father and me together?"

"Liv, I can't picture him with anyone else but you. He's so stubborn. When he was going through all the crap after Jenna I kept telling him to call you, but you know him. He's so stubborn. I was mad at him for the longest time. For a while there he just gave up on life. I always knew he cared for you and when he and Mom fell apart I hoped he would get his head together and pursue you. I know you guys never did anything while he was married to Mom, but I knew he had feelings for you. I hope you guys can work things out. I think you really make him happy Liv. That's all I want for him. Mom is deliriously happy with her new love and I want the same for him."

"Wow, Maureen, that's…I'm just surprised. I figured you hated what the job and all the people in it did to him and you wouldn't want to see any of us again."

"Liv, you did so many things to try to keep us all together over the years. I respect you for that. I can't tell you what it meant to know you were there."

"Thanks Maur. That means a lot."

They both watched out the window as Nick played ball with Eli.

"You're partner is sure cute. What's it like working with someone else besides Dad?"

"He's married and to answer your question, it took a long time to get used to him. He was patient though and he never gave up on me. He sort of wormed his way in and we have a really good relationship. He reminds me of your dad in a lot of ways, but he's softer in some ways. He's very open about how he feels and he's so dedicated. I hear you're dedicated too."

"Yeah, I really like my work. I'm surprised I haven't ended up on one of your cases yet. I don't get to go to trial yet except as an assistant but someday…"

"You'll be great. Come on let's go join the guys."

The rest of the evening was filled with laughter and stories and reconnecting. Eli sat in Elliot's lap most of the night, but when he started to get tired he crawled up into Liv's lap and fell asleep. They excused themselves and took him to bed leaving Nick and Maureen alone.

"So how do you like working with Liv?"

"She's the best. I've learned more from her in this year than I've learned since I've been a cop. She's amazin'."

"Yeah. What do you think about her and my dad together?"

"I think he really makes her happy. She's been so sad this whole year. I hate seein' someone so miserable. Now she has this glow about her. It's nice. I'm just afraid I'm gonna lose a great partner."

"You think she'll want to stay here with Dad?"

"Maybe."

"So tell me about your family."

"Well, my wife Maria is in Iraq and I have a little four year old daughter Zara. My mother is taking care of her while I'm here. I hate to be away from her when her mom already is away. It's hard, you know?"

"I'm sorry Nick. That has to be hard. If I ever find someone I want to spend the rest of my life with I sure don't want to be separated from him for months on end. I admire you both."

Upstairs in Eli's room Liv helped Elliot get him into his pajamas. She held him while Elliot undressed him. He was so cute…like a ragdoll. Elliot turned down the covers and Liv slipped him in bed. They sat on either side of the bed and looked at him.

"He loves you a lot LIv. He talks about you all the time. You know how rare that is for a three year old when he hasn't seen you since he was two? Most kids don't even have strong memories that young."

"I missed him."

She reached and smoothed back a curl from Eli's forehead.

They stood up and walked to the door. Elliot caught Liv's hand just as she reached the hallway. He pressed her into the wall right outside Eli's room and kissed her softly.

"I could get used to putting Eli to bed with you."

"So could I, but we better get back down to Nick and Maureen. I don't want to leave them in an uncomfortable silence."

As they reached the bottom of the stairs Liv realized she needn't have worried. The sound of laughter wafted in through the door as they listened to the two young people bantering with each other.

It sounded like the weekend was going to be a wonderful break for everyone.


	11. Chapter 11

**Deep Running**

**Chapter Eleven**

**Zebraboymom**

**Disclaimer: They belong to me in my dreams only. **

**Author Notes: The weekend continues and conversations are had.**

Elliot insisted Liv take his room and the girls ended up having a slumber party. Elliot slept in Eli's room with him and Nick slept in the room Dickie used when he visited. The next day there were plans to take Eli to the Cobblestone Children's Museum of Fredericksburg. Eli loved to go there.

It was only about 20 miles from Elliot's house, so after breakfast they all piled into his SUV and headed out.

Nick laughed as he watched Bad Ass Benson and the Unstabler romp through the different stations with Eli. They may be old, but they were definitely great at the parenting thing. He and Maureen walked along and talked together. He liked this woman. She was just as comfortable talking with him or walking along in comfortable silence. That was rare with someone you just met.

He was thinking how much Zara would love coming here. She was inquisitive and curious. The water play and the pretend super market would have been two of her favorites. He made a mental note to bring her here some day.

"You're thinking about your daughter, aren't you?"

Nick turned to Maureen surprised at her insight.

"Am I that obvious?"

"Yeah, you are. You must miss her a lot. I can see it when you look at Eli. When I was little, Dad always called me when he was caught up in a case. I hated not spending time with him. He wouldn't talk long, just a goodnight or how was school, but it meant a lot. I bet you're a great dad just like mine."

"I want to be. She looks at me with such love and trust. There's nothing like it. I want more kids. When Maria finishes her tour, I want to talk about having another one before Zara gets too much older."

"That sounds so great."

"What?"

"Oh, marriage and a family."

"It'll happen for you. Your young still."

"I know. I just can't find a guy who's committed and who I'd trust with my life. I want what my parents had and what Liv and Dad now have. That kind of relationship doesn't come around that often, but I'm not going to settle, you know?"

"Good. You're a great person and you deserve someone who will treat you right Maureen."

Maureen felt her stomach do a flip. Why couldn't she find someone like Nick? He made her feel so incredible. The way he smiled at her was so kind and sweet. Most men looked at her like she was their next meal.

Eli suddenly ran to Maureen and pulled her hand.

"Maur come in the ball room with me. Pleeeeease."

Nick grinned at her as the little guy dragged her to a room full of balls of all types and sizes. Nick followed them and soon an all out war ensued. Elliot and Liv sat on a bench outside the glassed in room and laughed at their antics.

Elliot watched the smile spreading across Liv's face and he slipped her hand into his, rubbing his thumb across her knuckles.

"Thanks for being so understanding about the kids being here."

"I love being with them Elliot. It's so great to reconnect with Maureen and I love that little boy like he was my own."

"Nick and Maureen seem to be getting along great."

"He's good with everyone. He has the best people skills I have ever seen."

"He's a nice change from me huh?"

"El, I loved working with you. We shared one brain. It was different with you, but I'm learning to respect the differences Nick brings as well. I had to adapt."

"I'm so sorry LIv. I hate what I put you through."

"It's over El. Let's try to put it behind us."

Elliot brushed his fingers along her cheek and she leaned into his touch.

"Thanks Liv."

Elliot looked to see what the others were doing before he cupped her cheek and kissed her softly. That lead to another kiss and another and soon both forgot where they were. They continued until they heard loud banging on the glass and broke apart to see three faces pressed to the glass grinning. Eli ran out fast.

"You kissed Livy. You like her don't you?"

"Yeah, I do Buddy. How about some lunch?"

"Hooray! Burgers? Please?"

"You got it."

Elliot swung him up on his shoulders and Eli grabbed his head as they headed out of the museum.

They decided to walk around the lake after lunch. Later a game of football got pretty competitive when it was boys against the girls. At one point Nick picked up a giggling Eli and the ball and took on Maureen as Liv tried to cover Elliot. Nick zagged right and Maureen zagged left tripping as they ran towards the goal. Elliot picked Liv up off the ground preventing her from intercepting them and both Nick and Eli did the victory dance in their "endzone".

Nick laughed as he reached a hand out to pull Maureen up off the ground. He smiled at her affectionately and reached to pull a twig out of her hair. Maureen froze as his hand brushed her cheek and he held the offending stick up for her to see. She giggled nervously and took it from him.

"What a face plant Stabler."

"Ha. Very funny. I get it. You know, you guys are cheaters."

Elliot walked over and they high-fived each other.

"No, we just had strength and skill."

Liv and Maureen rolled their eyes.

"Let's have some lemonade and let the testosterone levels settle."

As they plopped down on the blanket and Liv pulled out the cold pack of lemonade, Maureen's phone rang. It was Kathleen.

"Hey Kat, what's up?"

They couldn't hear what she was saying, but could tell from Maureen's responses that she wanted information.

"Yeah, we're all here together. At the lake. Yeah, they're pretty cute together."

Maureen smiled.

"Okay, I'll ask him. Dad, Kathleen and the twins want to come down for a visit and to see Liv, but they can't do next weekend.

"Actually the weekend after that is better anyway. That's the end of the fourth week and everyone gets the entire weekend off starting on Friday after the last class. If Liv is okay with it, tell them they're all invited to come for the whole weekend."

Liv's response was enthusiastic.

"I'd love to see them."

Arrangements were made and then Elliot talked to each of his other three children. When he hung up he saw Nick's face and took a chance.

"Nick, how about you ask your mother and Zara for the weekend?"

"My mom doesn't drive."

"I'd be glad to go and pick them up and bring them for you Nick."

"You'd do that Maureen?"

"Are you kidding? You need to see your daughter and I'd love to meet her."

"That's…that's really sweet of you Maureen. I can't even begin to tell you what it would mean to me."

"I'd love to do it. It will give me time to pump your mother for information Liv could use against you in the future, right Liv?"

Maureen grinned at him as he reached for her. She jumped up and ran away with Eli following her laughing. Nick went in mock pursuit and snatched her up in the air. The sound of her laughter floated past them as Eli danced around them.

Elliot loved to see his daughter happy, but he knew this could only lead to heartache. He exchanged a knowing look with Olivia.

"I'll talk to him. Don't worry El. Nick isn't the kind of guy that would do anything to hurt her."

"I know, but she'll get hurt anyway."

He sighed as he watched Nick set her back down on the ground and brush her hair behind her shoulder letting his hand rest there for a moment. Maureen's eyes were fixed on him and Elliot yelled at them to come on. They were leaving.

Eli skipped between Nick and Maureen on the way back holding each of their hands and begging them to swing him. They were very cute together and Liv sighed sadly. Elliot was right. Maureen was falling for Nick.

Once they got back to the house, Liv and Maureen packed some sandwiches before the two Stabler kids had to head out back to New York. She caught Maureen's eyes drifting out to the two men having a beer out on the deck. Liv knew she wanted to talk about things.

"Nick's nice, isn't he?"

"Yeah…yeah he is. You don't meet a nice guy like that very often, especially one that understands what you do for a living and how important it is."

"Don't worry Maur. You're going to find a great guy someday. I know it."

"Thanks Liv. I'm really glad you got a great guy. I can't think of anyone I would want to see Dad happy with more than you."

They walked out to the car with their arms around each other.

Nick and Elliot brought their bags and loaded them in the back. He pulled his daughter into a hug before he picked up Eli and kissed him.

"Be careful and call me when you get in."

"Yes, Dad."

Maureen hugged Liv and walked around the car to where Nick was opening her door for her. She held out her hand to him.

"It was really nice getting to know you Nick."

"Same here Maur."

That was the first time he had used her nickname all weekend. It made her feel that queasiness in her stomach again. He held her hand for a moment longer and then released it to hold her door for her. As he shut it he smiled down at her.

"I'll look forward to seeing you in two weeks."

"Me too. Bye everybody."

They watched as the taillights disappeared around the curve and then started loading up the SUV. Nick climbed in the car to give Elliot and Olivia a moment alone when they went back to shut everything up.

Elliot flipped off the lights and pulled Liv into a passionate embrace.

"Next weekend…you and me…all weekend long right here. We are not leaving the house. Got it?"

Liv got the message loud and clear as he kissed her deeply.

"Message received. I can't wait El. It's going to be a long week in between."

"For me too."

He pulled her close again and this time the kiss took on a life of its own. Just as Elliot pushed Liv against the wall the car horn sounded.

"Sounds like Amaro is getting restless. We better go."

"Did I mention how much I hate your partner's timing?"

**A/N: Next chapter is E/O fluff all the way. Just a warning. Then it's the weekend with all the kids and a tragedy strikes without warning.**


	12. Chapter 12

**Deep Running**

**Chapter Twelve**

**Zebraboymom**

**Disclaimer: They belong to me in my dreams only. **

**Author Notes: Elliot and Liv have a weekend to themselves. Remember, fluff warning. If you aren't E/O then don't read this chapter.**

Nick woke up on Monday with a huge smile on his face. He was going to contact his mother after training ended and tell her about the weekend coming up. If he could just make it through the next twelve days he could spend an entire weekend with his daughter.

Liv was up early and was already at her desk texting Fin.

"So, no workout this morning? What gives Amaro? Are you getting soft on me?"

"Look who's talking. A long breakfast with Stabler trumps keeping in shape?"

Liv laughed and grabbed her notebook.

"See you soon."

And she was off to meet Elliot.

Nick grinned at the bounce in his partner's step and got up to head for the shower.

That night Nick called his mother and told her about the weekend they had planned. He assured her that Maureen was a safe driver, which he really didn't know was true, but if Elliot trusted her with Eli he was pretty sure she was good. Then he was able to tell Zara that he would see her in a few days. She danced around the room clapping her hands and Nick was so glad he had Skype so he could watch her.

"Night Button."

"Night Daddy. I miss you."

"Me too sweetie. You have no idea how much."

His conversation with Maria didn't go like he hoped it would. She could only talk for a few minutes. Her unit was packing up and moving to a new location and she would not be able to contact him for two to three weeks. He could tell by her reluctance to talk about it that it was dangerous and she didn't want him to know.

They just sat and looked at each other for a while before they clicked off. He went to sleep that night feeling so far from her. They didn't tell each other things like they used to. He didn't tell her about the serial killer and how he had killed for the first time in the line of duty.

He figured she had enough on her mind without worrying about him. How many other things were they keeping from each other? It was like they didn't know each other any more. Was there someone there she confided in instead of him? It made him feel jealous. Before he went to sleep he said a prayer for her safety.

Saturday evening finally came and Elliot grinned at Nick as Liv packed a bag.

"See you tomorrow night."

"You guys have a good time. Don't bother coming back early for me."

"Oh, believe me we won't."

The two ex-partners practically ran to the jeep. Smoldering looks were exchanged as Elliot exceeded the legal limit of speed on more than one road leading to his house. Once there, they grabbed their bags and went inside. As soon as the door was shut behind them, Elliot swept Olivia into his arms and kissed her deeply. Before they knew it they were against that same wall from last weekend exploring each other's mouths and touching new and exciting places on each other.

Just as clothing was at the point of being removed, Elliot stopped and pulled back. Liv's cloudy gaze met his and she was worried he had changed his mind.

"Don't worry Liv, I want you so bad I can't stand it, but not here like this up against a wall. I love you and I want to make love to you. I've waited thirteen years for this. I want to wine you and dine you and then I want to make love to you in a way that will erase any man you have ever been."

Liv chuckled.

"Pretty sure of yourself there El."

The way he kissed her next made her almost pass out and she was left with no doubt as to whether or not he could make good on his words. They put their bags away and Elliot made some more verbal promises as they headed down to dinner. One of them included the two of them in his Jacuzzi together. By the time they sat down to eat Liv's body was literally humming with excitement.

Dinner was by candlelight. Never in a million years had she ever expected this to happen for real.

"El, you never cease to amaze me. I never thought you'd be a romantic."

"Really?"

"I have just never seen this side of you, so this is all new."

Elliot got up and came around to her chair, pulling it back,

"Good. I'm glad I can surprise you after all these years."

He reached down and pulled her out of her seat. What he did next stunned Olivia. He swept her up into his arms and started carrying her upstairs.

"Elliot!"

"Relax Liv, just playing out a little Gone With The Wind fantasy I have."

"You've watched Gone with the Wind?"

"Three daughters, remember? Now, no more talking."

"Yes Rhett."

His lips held hers as he climbed the stairs and headed for his bedroom. He laid her gently on the bed and she watched as he slowly and completely stripped off everything her was wearing never breaking eye contact with her. Liv's eyes grazed over his beautiful body. He had scars, but she knew everyone of them and how he got them. It only added to his muscular beauty. Her eyes were huge as she drank all of him in. He was gorgeous. She suddenly felt embarrassed of her own body.

Elliot saw her hesitation.

"Don't worry Liv. We'll go slow."

He crawled on the bed with her and kissed her deeply. Liv sank into the kiss and when he pulled back she looked into his eyes. She saw only warmth and love in them.

"You have a beautiful body Liv. It's full in all the right places and you have nothing to be embarrassed about. I love you…the total package. Understand?"

Liv nodded.

"Now, I want to see all of you."

Elliot slowly and gently removed a piece of clothing at a time and kissed her exposed skin as he revealed it. By the time Liv was totally naked her want for him was overwhelming. She had never been so tenderly administered to in her entire life and the love in Elliot's eyes as he settled over her brought her to tears.

"I love you Liv. Why the tears Honey?"

"I love you too El. That's why I'm crying. I've never…"

"…been loved like this before?"

She could only nod.

"Well, get ready because it's going to be like this for the rest of your life if I have any say in it. I'm going to make you all mine now Liv, forever."

And then he joined himself to her and she went spiraling over the edge into the greatest bliss she had ever known.

Several hours later they sat in the warm waters of the Jacuzzi. Liv had her back to Elliot and his arms were around her stroking over her naked body. She could feel herself getting sleepy as he gently rubbed and massaged her sated body.

"Liv?"

"Mhm?"

"I want to ask you something, but I don't want you to freak out."

"Okay."

Silence filled the room except for the soft sound of the bubbles and jets on the tub.

Liv turned in Elliot's arms to look into his dazzling blue eyes.

"What El? You can ask me anything. You know that, right?"

"I just don't want you to run."

"I promised you I was done running, remember?"

"Okay then. Liv I want to marry you. I know it seems fast and I know you probably haven't even thought about it, but I have. The problem is I'm afraid you won't want to leave New York and I'm done with that life Liv. I can't even think about going back. I know you love it and I know I'm asking a lot, but please think about it."

He looked down, afraid to meet her eyes and see her shut down. He felt a soft hand lifting his chin to bring his eyes level with hers again.

"I didn't think there was anything or anyone that could ever make me want to leave SVU, but that isn't true anymore. The only constant in my life besides Nick is you and I have loved you for so long now I can't imagine not being with you. Being here in this place and seeing a totally different way to do life…has made me forget all about Manhattan and the life I had there. You're wrong about me never having thought about what being your wife could mean. I love you Elliot and I want to be with you, so if that really was a proposal, then my answer is yes."

For moments they just gazed into one another's eyes and then Elliot took her in his arms and they made love again splashing water out onto the floor. Neither one cared as a promise was sealed in those moments of passion.

**A/N: Next. The whole Stabler clan finds out the good news.**


	13. Chapter 13

**Deep Running**

**Chapter Thirteen**

**Zebraboymom**

**Disclaimer: They belong to me in my dreams only. **

**Author Notes: Elliot and Olivia share their relationship with all the Stabler children. Nick finds out he's going to be losing a partner.**

The next week flew by for Olivia, but for Nick it was agony waiting to see his daughter. It meant so much to him that Maureen was willing to bring them for a visit. He noticed that Liv had been nervous around him all week and Thursday night after dinner she asked him to take a walk with her.

Elliot hugged her and said he'd see her the next morning so Nick knew something was up. They always spent every last minute with each other after training ended. As soon as they started walking the track he turned to her.

"Spill it Liv."

"What?"

"Whatever has had you tied up in knots all week, just spit it out."

"Can we sit?"

"Sure."

As they sat down on the bleachers Liv looked into Nick's sweet brown eyes. He knew her well. In the year they had been friends and partners her had learned her every mood much the way Elliot did, only he was actually better at reading her than El was at times. She didn't deserve such a great guy to work with.

"Somethin's been bothering you all week and I've just been waitin' for you to say it. Is the weekend off? It's okay if it is. You know that, right?"

"Oh Nick, of course the weekend is on. I just felt like I needed to tell you something before we tell the kids."

"Tell the kids what?"

"Nick, Elliot asked me to marry him and I said yes."

"Oh."

"Yeah. I'm planning to leave SVU and move down here after the wedding."

"You're retiring?"

"I have my twenty years in and I want a life that doesn't include all the death and abused children and horror. I want a life with Elliot. I love him very much."

"Yeah, I kind of knew this was coming. I didn't see him coming back to New York with you and it's a bit far to commute. I guess I knew what was coming. I just didn't want to think about it."

They sat quietly together for a bit before Nick spoke.

"I'm gonna miss you Liv. I've learned so much from you and you have such good instincts about things. It's gonna be hard to find another partner like you."

"Hey, I'll be by as much as I can. El's kids live in New York so we will come up often. I'd like to stay in your life Nick. We'd love to have you come and visit any time you get some down time. We can be your little oasis from the job. When Maria gets back we'd love to spend time with her too."

Nick smiled softly at her and bumped her knee with his.

"You're really doing this huh?"

"Yeah, I guess I am. I never thought I'd ever get married. It just wasn't something I thought would ever happen and for it to be the love of my life…I'm sort of on cloud nine right now."

"So, how did the big mug do it?"

"What? Propose? No way I am telling you that."

"I'll just have to get my friend Maureen to get it out of you."

"Nick, about Maureen…"

"Relax Olivia. She's a friend just like you are. I love my wife and I hope you know me well enough to know I would never jeopardize that."

"I do."

They stood to walk back and Nick pulled her into a hug. He was trying not to cry, but he really cared for this woman. He would miss her, but he was glad she was happy. He whispered into her hair.

"Congratulations Liv."

"Thanks for making it so easy to tell you."

"I want you to be happy Liv. Even though it was horrible in so many ways, this last year was one of the best of my life because of you and it's definitely time you had a life. So, Olivia Stabler, huh?"

"Maybe."

"You're tellin' me you wouldn't take your man's name?"

"Benson-Stabler."

Nick grinned.

"That's my girl. Let's go give Stabler a hard time. I'll pretend I said no way and you decided you could stay in the city during the week and come home on weekends."

"You are evil Amaro. I like it."

On Friday afternoon the three friends climbed into a jeep and headed out for Elliot's house. Maureen had already called to say they were there, so Nick could hardly wait to see his little girl. As they pulled up in the driveway he saw the entire Stabler clan playing croquet on the front lawn and Zara was right in the middle of it welding a croquet mallet that was as big as she was.

As soon as the car stopped, Nick was out of his seat and calling her name.

"Zara!"

"Daddy!"

She threw down the mallet and raced into his arms. He held her high up in the air and then smothered her with kisses, hugging her tightly.

"We's playin' croak it."

"You are? How does that work?"

"You hit the ball through the hoop de doops."

"I see."

"Want to play?"

"Not right now. I want to unpack and see Grandma, okay?"

"Okay Daddy."

He set her down and smiled as she ran over to pick up her mallet. Maureen waved at him and he returned the wave. He turned to his mother who was sitting on the porch and went to hug her as the entire Stabler clan attacked Liv.

Olivia was hardly out of her seat when an enthusiastic Kathleen grabbed her.

"Before you ask, I'm on my meds, I'm working full time and I have a boyfriend. I am so glad to see you Liv. It's been too long."

"Thanks Kat. That means a lot."

Next the twins grabbed her and she couldn't get over how grown up they both looked.

"Wow Richard! You are looking more like your dad every day."

"Is that a good thing?"

Liv winked at Elliot.

"A very good thing."

Lizzie looked up at Liv with tears in her eyes.

"I've missed you Liv."

"I missed you too Lizzie or should I call you Elizabeth now?"

"Actually I like Beth and Dickie wants to be called Rich now. Only I still get to call him Dickie."

"You are so beautiful Beth. I can't believe what a beautiful young lady you have become or what a handsome young man your brother has become."

Elliot had made his way around to the back and unloaded the bags before the attack group hit him next. After hugs and kisses were passed out, Rich stunned the couple.

"So are you guys an item or what? Inquiring young minds want to know."

"Would you be glad to hear we were seeing each other or angry?"

Maureen walked up at that moment and kissed her father.

"Sorry, Dad, I already sort of primed them. They know you're crazy about each other. Hey, Nick."

"Hey Maureen. Good to see you."

It was not lost on Kathleen that from the way her sister was looking at this guy, she had a crush on him. She had to admit he was really cute, but a little too old for her own taste. She did see the wedding ring on his finger and knew that her sister was only going to get hurt. They would have to have a talk.

"We think it's great Dad. Mom is happy and we want you to be happy. What better way to start a relationship than with someone who is already your best friend."

"That's very insightful of you Lizzie. How long have you been practicing that little speech?"

"Daddy, don't call me Lizzie. It's Beth."

"Oh right. Hey Dickie, help me carry these bags in will ya?"

The young man groaned and Elliot laughed.

"Gotcha Rich."

The entire group laughed and grabbed a bag to carry inside. Eli had joined the group now and was hugging Liv's leg. She reached down and swept him up to carry him inside.

The house came alive with so many young people and it occurred to Liv that she was having her very first family experience. She remembered the night she sat in the sedan and told Elliot she had been alone her whole life. Not any more.

Nick's mother sat and smiled at the antics of the young people. They made her feel very at ease and Nick was thankful for that.

The conversation at dinner was filled with laughter and teasing. Liv caught Elliot watching her from across the table. He was resting his chin in his hand and enjoying the amazing smile on her face.

"So, Dad, when are you going to make an honest woman out of Liv?"

Kathleen's question stunned Olivia and she had a silent conversation with El. They had planned to wait until Sunday, but now seemed to be as good a time as any.

"It's funny you should ask that Kat. I…uh…I actually asked her last weekend."

The room erupted in screams and Zara put her hands over her ears it was so loud. Both Elliot and Olivia were bombarded with hugs and kisses and handshakes. Liv started to tear up. She had never expected to be welcomed into this family so openly.

"I…I can't tell you all what this means to me."

"We love you Liv. You have always been there for us. You came to our games and you stepped in when Kathleen needed you, when Rich needed you and you helped save Mom and Eli. Heck, you put up with Dad all those years. Why wouldn't we love you? Dad obviously does. He's been miserable this last year without you. We could all see it. Life is too short. Be happy."

"Thanks Maureen. I can't think of a better family to be adopted into."

Beth stood up.

"Cake. This calls for cake."

The girls went to cut cake for everyone and the rest of them cleared the table. After dessert they played cards and talked while the little kids played with Duplo blocks on the floor.

Around nine o'clock Nick picked up Zara.

"Time for bed Sweet Pea. It's late."

Maureen quickly grabbed Eli and they went upstairs together. Liv and Elliot exchanged a look, but remained where they were. They had to trust Nick and El trusted his daughter. To do anything else would just make the situation uncomfortable. They had to allow the friendship even though they both knew Maureen wanted more.

Maureen smiled at Nick as they climbed the stairs.

"How was your last two weeks?"

"Actually really great. The training has been awesome and watching Liv and Elliot has been like a romantic comedy."

He chuckled at catching them kissing more than once.

"Do tell."

"Well, let's see. I caught them kissing in our room, in the closet in his classroom and in the gym behind the punching bag. They're really cute together. Two tough cops who act like teenagers."

"So Liv isn't going back with you, is she?"

"She will just come back long enough to give her notice, fill out her retirement paperwork and to clean out and pack her apartment. I have to find a new partner. It's going to be hard. I never met anyone like Liv."

"I hear that. She's so self-sacrificing. I don't know if I could do that given the life she had growing up. That kind of stuff usually makes someone mean, but she's so kind and loving."

"You should see her with the victims. It's amazing the way she can get them to open up. They all love her. I wish I was that good."

"You will be."

"Thanks for the vote of confidence."

The little ones had begged to share a room, so they got them ready for bed. Maureen and Nick grinned as they stood side by side on the step stool in the bathroom and brushed their teeth. Maureen sang the ABC song softly so they knew how long to keep brushing. As he watched her, his mind went to thoughts of her as a mother. She would be amazing.

They both chuckled as the two tapped their brushes out at the same time and drank and spit in perfect sync as well.

Maureen and Nick sat on one bed together with a child in each lap. They took turns reading a favorite book of Eli's called 'The Little Mouse, The Red Ripe Strawberry and The Big Hungry Bear'. The kids laughed at the antics of the mouse and the voice each of the adults made as the narrator.

As Maureen closed the book the two of them exchanged a look. It felt very intimate all of a sudden. Nick grabbed Zara and carried her over to her bed, tucking her in and kissing her.

"Wait!"

"What?"

Zara jumped out of bed and ran over to Eli giving him a big kiss. The little boy looked stunned, but then his lips spread into a huge smile.

"Night. night Eli."

"Night Zara."

The grown ups both tried to stifle a laugh as they went to turn down the lights and leave.

Once they were down the hall, they burst out laughing. As they came down the stairs everyone had moved to the living room.

"What's so funny?"

"Zara just gave your son his first kiss."

Everyone burst into laughter at Elliot's face.

"Relax. It was a totally innocent goodnight kiss."

Seems the Amaro Family had quit the effect on his family.

The rest of the night was filled with more games until people began to filter off. The girls all went together as they were sharing a room. Richard and Nick were sharing and Nick's mother had been given the only downstairs bedroom so she wouldn't have to climb the stairs.

Elliot and Liv turned off all the lights and checked to be sure Mrs. Amaro had everything she needed.

"You have a lovely family. Thanks for doing this for my Nick."

"It was our pleasure Mrs. Amaro. We love your son. You did a great job with him."

"Thank you. Good night."

Liv and Elliot wrapped their arms around each other's waists and climbed the stairs to his room. The kids had made it very clear during the evening that they had no problem with them sharing a bed.

Elliot and Liv undressed each other lovingly and slipped under the covers. They made love slowly and sweetly more than once and then fell asleep exhausted in each other's arms.

What a perfect weekend…


	14. Chapter 14

**Deep Running**

**Chapter Fourteen**

**Zebraboymom**

**Disclaimer: They belong to me in my dreams only. **

**Author Notes: The weekend continues and relationships grow.**

Saturday after a huge pancake breakfast there was a football game in the back yard. It was boys against the girls. Nick, Elliot, Rich and Eli were going against Liv, Maureen, Kathleen, Beth and Zara.

The boys were acting so smug. They were sure they would slaughter the girls, but Liv and Maureen had a plan. Divide and conquer. If Liv could distract Elliot the other two guys would have three on two.

Liv flirted mercilessly with Elliot and as planned he was distracted. She pretended to go long and El fell for it, blocking her and they got into a wrestling match that left her breathless.

Kathleen had the ball and Maureen took off running. Rich was covering Beth and Nick saw Maureen making a break for open territory. Zara ran up to her dad at that point and tried to tackle him. He tickled her and she dropped on the lawn giggling as Eli plopped himself down on her.

This allowed Nick to intercept Maureen. She dodged right and he dodged left allowing her to think she could get past. As soon as she went forward he grabbed her and brought her gently to the ground.

Maureen laughed as she rolled over and then realized she was still in Nick's arms. They both looked at each other for a moment and then they jumped up in embarrassment. Kathleen saw the whole thing. She was definitely going to have a talk with her big sister.

In the end the boys won it. Elliot figured out Liv's plan and they turned the tables on the girls. Nick was careful to avoid tackling Maureen anymore, but they still had fun taking on the little kids.

The afternoon was hamburgers on the grill while Nick and Maureen blew up the kiddy pool and the little kids went swimming. Zara was so cute in her bright red bathing suit. Nick put Eli's slide into the end of the pool and they slid down over and over again, chasing each other to see who would be first to go down.

Richard made a bunch of water balloons and the younger people had a balloon fight while Elliot, Liv and Nick's mother sat in the shade and drank lemonade. Liv had never been happier in her entire life.

Nick's mother noticed Nick and Maureen were having their own private war as the other siblings attacked Richard. She was worried about her son. He had been alone for too long and the distance between him and her daughter-in-law was widening by the day. It was obvious this young woman was starting to become important to him. This would not be an easy talk to have with him, but it was time, before this attraction went too far.

That evening the whole family watched a movie and it wasn't lost on her that Maureen sat on the floor right next to where Nick was sitting on the couch with Zara.

Liv noticed it too, especially when the little girl climbed down from her father and into Maureen's lap. Nick looked down at her and smiled. He stroked his daughter's hair and his fingers lingered for just a second on Maureen's shoulder.

Both had professed friendship, but Liv had a funny feeling about that. She knew what friendship with Elliot had led to, at least on her part. She didn't want Maureen to spend time waiting for Nick to be free. The young man was just starting his marriage.

Elliot noticed Eli had fallen asleep and he picked him up off the floor and headed upstairs wishing everyone good night. Zara had fallen asleep in Maureen's arms and Liv volunteered to take her along as well.

The young people started on movie number two as Nick's mother wished them good night too. Maureen and Nick went to pop popcorn and get sodas. Each of them kept glancing at the other one when they thought they weren't looking. When they came back the five of them squeezed around the coffee table and shared the popcorn. After the bowl was empty Nick ad Maureen sat back against the couch side by side.

Nick could smell her shampoo. It was a sweet fragrance and it suited her perfectly. About halfway through the movie he felt her slide closer and her head made its way to his shoulder. He wanted to put his arm around her, but he knew that would be crossing a line. It was then that he saw Kathleen watching them.

It was obvious the young woman disapproved of their relationship. He kept telling himself that they were just friends and friends offered a shoulder when they needed it, but this girl was boring a hole in him. He gently shook Maureen awake.

"I'm tired. You girls took your toll on me today. I'm going to bed. Goodnight."

"I'll go with you. I'm beat too."

Nick offered her a hand up and she followed him up the stairs. Kathleen watched them go and looked at the twins. They were both engrossed in the movie and oblivious to the little drama unfolding before them. Kathleen cleared the bowls away and headed up the stairs to have that talk.

Once they reached Maureen's room Nick turned to her and wished her good night.

"Night Maur."

She liked the way he said her nickname.

"Night Nick."

They hesitated for a moment and then Nick knew they were headed for dangerous waters. The sound of Kathleen clearing her throat made them jump apart.

"Night Kat."

"Night Nick."

Nick went to bed confused about his feelings. He had to keep this relationship on the friendship track, but Maureen made it hard. She was really special. He snuck into Zara's room to give her a kiss and check on her and then headed to bed thinking about Maria and when she would be available to talk to. He really needed to see her right now.

As soon as they were inside their room Kathleen started in.

"What was that?"

"What was what?"

"You and Nick. What's going on Maur?"

"Nothing's going on. We're friends. He's married in case you haven't noticed."

"Are you kidding me? The doe eyes, the looks, the touches. There is more than friendship going on."

"No there isn't and tomorrow I'm going to be sure he understands that."

"You promise?"

"Yeah. I have to keep the relationship under control. I don't want to be a home wrecker. That's not my style and you know it. Besides, Nick isn't that way either. He loves his wife."

"You just seem like your friendship is leading to something."

"Relax Sis. I've got this under control."

In their bedroom down the hall Liv and Elliot cuddled after making love.

"I'm going to talk to Nick tomorrow."

"About Maureen?"

"Yes."

"Do you think I should talk to her?"

"Maybe. I just think with his wife so far away a friendship with another woman isn't a good idea."

"I know. She's going to be devastated. She hasn't had very many friendships lately. They seem to get each other."

"I know."

"Let's not talk about it anymore, okay?"

"Hmm, now what could distract me from thinking about it."

Liv giggled as Elliot rolled her over on her back and settled over her for round two.

Sunday morning everyone slept in. Elliot usually made them all go to church, but the weekend was short and he wouldn't get to see them for another month so he wanted to spend as much time as he could with them.

After a sort of brunch they all headed out to the lake and the twins took the canoe out with Kathleen.

Nick's mom watched the little kids as they played on the swings and Elliot took Maureen for a walk while Liv took Nick for one.

"Daddy, I know what this talk is about."

"Do you?"

"I'm going to talk to Nick before we leave today. I plan to stay away while he's here and then he goes back to New York and his life. With Liv leaving SVU I won't see him much anymore, so problem solved."

Elliot stopped her and looked into her eyes.

"Is it?"

She shrugged her shoulders and tried to smile, but the tears came and she shook her head no. Elliot wrapped her up in his arms and held her tightly. He hated to see his kids suffer.

"It's okay Honey. He's a really nice guy. It's understandable."

"Why can't I meet a nice guy who isn't already taken?"

"It will happen Honey. I know God has someone as special as Nick for you."

"Thanks Dad. I wish I had you're optimism."

Elliot kissed her on the forehead.

"I wasn't always this way."

"Don't I know it?"

On the other side of the lake Liv asked Nick to sit for a bit.

"Don't start Liv. I know what you're goin' to say."

"Do you?"

"I know Maureen and I are getting' too close. I'm going to talk to her today, okay?"

Liv looked knowingly at him. He meant a lot to her too and she knew it was easy for Maureen to like him. He was just being Nick.

"You make it too easy to care about you. You know that don't you?"

"How's that?"

"You're a very committed man who is passionate, caring, a great dad and husband. Who wouldn't be attracted to that?"

"You're a good friend Liv. I promise you I can be a good friend to Maureen without crossin' a line."

"Let her down gently. Promise Nick?"

"Promise."

Liv left Nick there and walked around to where Elliot and Maureen were walking their direction.

"El, why don't we go check on the kids and Nick's mom. I think they need to talk."

Maureen continued onto where Nick sat with his arms resting on his knees. He looked like he was praying.

"Is this seat taken?"

"Just savin' it for you."

They sat for a bit. It scared them both just how comfortable they felt with each other.

"Nick…"

"Maur..."

"You go first."

"Maureen I have enjoyed meeting you so much and I really like spendin' time with you. I like it a little too much. Do you understand what I'm sayin' to you?"

"I…I feel the same way Nick. I think it would be a good idea if we didn't see each other for awhile and then maybe when your wife comes home we can be friends."

"I'd like that, although I already count you as a good friend Maur. We just need to be sure we keep our relationship just that…friends."

"Agreed. It will be hard though."

"For me too."

They smiled at each other one last time and then stood to walk back.

"Can a friend give another friend a last hug?"

Nick opened his arms to her.

"Willingly."

They held each other like it really were the last time and it probably was, at least like this without the complication of his family.

When they arrived back at the car, the others were tying the canoe on top and loading up. Kathleen saw the look on her sister's face and knew she was hurting. She sat next to her in the car and held her hand. It was time to go home and everyone was quiet on the way back.

There was a mad rush to load everybody's cars when they got home. Everyone was due back and they had to get on the road. Nick sat on the porch steps holding Zara as the little girl became teary-eyed.

"I'll miss you so much Daddy."

"Me too, Sweetheart. One more month to go and I will be home. I promise."

He kissed his mom as she got in the car with Maureen and then buckled Zara into her car seat. She reached for him again and he hugged her tight.

Maureen looked at him over the front seat and he gave her a smile and a wink. They both knew their relationship would be okay.

Elliot was having a conversation with Eli.

"I'll miss you Daddy and Livvy too. I want to stay with you."

"Hey buddy, when this camp is over I get you for six weeks."

"Cool!"

"Mind your sister, okay?"

He buckled Eli in next to Zara in the backseat and the two children held hands as the car pulled away.

Maureen kept her eyes on Nick in the rearview mirror until the road curved and she lost him. Was that the last time she would see him?

Kathleen and the twins left next and then it was just the three of them.

Nick was too quiet on the way back and Liv's heart went out to him. If she had a child it would be so hard to be away from her for so long.

Monday morning it was back to classes as usual. At lunch the four friends sat together talking about the weekend. Nick had his back to the door and Elliot was sitting across from him. Liv sat between her two men. Nick had just made some lame joke and they were laughing. It was time to think about heading out to their afternoon classes.

That's when Elliot saw them enter the cafeteria and walk towards them. He knew immediately who they were. It was a military Chaplain and a Casualty Assistance Officer.

"Nick…"

Liv looked at the ashen look on Elliot's face and then looked at the officers. She reached her hand out to Nick's shoulder as he turned around in his chair.

Elliot was out of his seat and coming around the table just as Liv stood up too. Nick stumbled to his feet.

"Detective Nicholas Amaro?"

"No. No. No. No!"

Nick started backing away as Liv and Elliot flanked him on either side.

"I'm so sorry sir. Is there somewhere we could talk?"


	15. Chapter 15

**Deep Running**

**Chapter Fifteen**

**Zebraboymom**

**Disclaimer: They belong to me in my dreams only. **

**Author Notes: Nick struggles to deal with the loss of his wife. Olivia and Elliot are going to be there for him along with Elliot's family. You guys have been so amazing with the reviews. I work full time so I rarely get to respond to them, but just know that they make me smile from ear to ear and make me want to write more and post more often just to hear from you and find out how much you enjoy reading the posts.**

Bob Nichols had come with the officers to find Nick and he led them to a quiet conference room just a few steps down the hall. Nick leaned heavily into Elliot as he and Liv supported the young man. He collapsed in a chair and they sat on either side of him.

Nick looked into the kind eyes of the men sitting across from him. He knew. He knew she wasn't just severely wounded. She was gone.

"Mr. Amaro it's with great sorrow that I tell you that your wife has been killed in action."

It broke Liv's heart to listen as Nick began to sob. His shoulders shook and she watched as Elliot took the man in his arms and held him. She had never loved her fiancé more than she did in that moment.

She could see Nick give into his grief and allow Elliot to be there for him. It was like watching a father and son.

As she watched the two men she cared so much about, she thought about all the times she had seen Elliot comfort the families of the victims and she wondered if he had done this same thing with soldiers he was with when he was in the marines.

The room was quiet for a long time while the officers quietly waited for Nick to gain control. Liv saw Nichols come back with a box of Kleenex.

"Take all the time you want. This room is yours for as long as you need it. I'm so sorry for your loss Detective."

Elliot looked up at his boss with gratitude.

"Thanks Bob."

The man quietly left the room and Liv handed a tissue to Nick as he sat up and tried to pull himself together. Elliot kept his hand at the man's back and Liv reached around to cover it with her own. Together they offered Nick their quiet support.

"How did it happen?"

"Several soldiers from her unit were being choppered into their new camp when it was hit by a surface to air missile. Her death was instantaneous as the helicopter exploded and then crashed to the ground."

"I won't be able to see her will I?"

"I'm sorry sir, but you wouldn't want to anyway. She was killed instantly and only her dog tags and dental records confirmed it was her body."

"How long before she's brought home?"

"Her body is in Dover right now, but as soon as her autopsy is concluded, she will be escorted back and will arrive in the states later this week."

"I…I need to call my mom. I need to tell her. My little girl…"

"Understood. Would you like us to accompany you home?"

'What? No. I…"

Nick was shutting down. Elliot knew what a shock like this could do to a person. He spoke up.

"His partner here and I will drive him home to his family. We'll be staying with him through this, right Liv?"

"He has strong support from our family and his family at work."

"Sir, is there anything else we can do for you right now?"

"No. I can't think of anythin' right now."

"Once you return home we can make arrangements for a full military funeral. You will receive the $100,000 benefit for the funeral arrangements and anything else you need. Your wife took out the full SGL insurance so there will be an additional $400,000 when the claim is settled. The army wants to make sure you and your daughter are well cared for."

"I don't care about that right now."

"We know, but sometimes the financial pressure can add to the grief and we don't want you to suffer any more than you are already. Would you like us to stay longer?"

"No. I'll be fine"

"We'll be in contact with the escort and will notify you when to come to the airport for the arrival of the casket. Once again the united states government and both of us personally want to express our sympathy for this grievous loss."

Nick stood shakily and shook the men's hands.

"Thank you for coming."

Liv appreciated the fact that they notified Nick in person. She couldn't imagine what a phone call like that could do to a person.

Nick sat back down and looked completely lost. That's when Elliot swept into action.

"Liv, let's help Nick down to my quarters. I have a full size bed and he can rest comfortably there. You can go and get his IPAD so he can Skype his mother."

Nick did whatever they asked of him. They walked with him down the hallway to El's room. Both had their hand on his back, as they were afraid he would collapse. The young man was determined he was not going to let that happen. As they passed Cassandra's classroom she spoke gently to Nick having witnessed his notification in the cafeteria.

"I'm so sorry Nick."

"Thanks Cassandra."

Once they were in Elliot's room Nick lay down on the bed and turned away from them.

"Could I have some time guys? Maybe come back in twenty minutes or so?"

"Sure Nick. Take all the time you need."

Once outside in the hall Liv broke down too. Elliot slipped his arms around her and held her close.

"Oh, El, my heart is broken for him."

"I know. I can't imagine what it would have done to Kathy if I'd been killed while she was pregnant with Maureen. His whole life is never going to be the same."

"His mother is his only family. His father is dead and Maria didn't have any family left. I don't even know if he has any siblings, but I don't think so."

"Well, he has family now. Our family is his family. You go get his IPAD and spend some time with him. He needs to get back to New York tonight and I'm going to talk to Bob about us accompanying him."

He bent to kiss Liv softly. He loved her so much and couldn't stand the idea of losing her ever.

"Watching him go through this reminds me that we could have lost each other so many times over the years. Thank God we didn't."

It was hard to separate in that moment, but things needed to get done. Liv went to their room and packed their bags before carrying Nick's IPAD back to Elliot's room.

Elliot went to Bob's office.

"Come on in Elliot. How is Nick doing? He's a good man and I've really enjoyed getting to know him these last few weeks. It's a terrible thing to go through for a young man. I'm glad he has your support. Olivia is going to want to leave with him I'm sure. Not a problem. They can both come back some time in the future and finish if they want to."

"Bob I don't know how to ask this, but…"

"Don't worry about it Elliot. I had a feeling you'd be asking for some leave time. I can take your class for you and the physical training exercises. Hell, I used to do your job years ago. Take all the time you need and come back after the funeral."

"I appreciate it so much Bob."

"I'm happy for you and Olivia too. I hope this doesn't overshadow your plans."

"Right now it's all about Nick. He's become a really good friend and we both just want to be there for him."

"Well, take care of him and let me know when the funeral is. We will plan to suspend classes that day so any of the officers who have gotten to know him can drive up and attend the funeral."

He shook Elliot's hand and then embraced him in a brief hug.

Back in Elliot's room Nick sat up and took the IPAD. He called his mother who looked surprised to be contacted in the middle of the day.

"What's going on Nicholas?"

One look at Nick's tear streaked face and she knew something had happened.

"What's wrong Mijo?"

"Ma…I…"

"Is it Maria?"

His face said everything.

"Oh, no…"

"Is Zara there? Please don't tell her yet. I don't want her to know until I can come home and tell her myself. Can you do that for me Ma? I know I shouldn't ask you, but we're leavin' soon and I should be home by dinnertime."

"She is going to be crushed. She's too little to have to deal with something like this so young. Come home right away Mijo. We will get through this together."

"I love you Ma."

"I love you too Nicholas."

Nick signed off before he started crying again. Ten minutes later the three of them were on the road. Nick never said a word the entire five-hour drive.

That night Elliot and Liv sat out on the porch of Nick's home and called Maureen. Nick was inside telling his daughter who had been so excited to see her daddy home early. It made them both sad to know her joy was about to be crushed. They thought about how happy she had been over the weekend. They had fallen in love with her.

"Hey Dad, what's up? I didn't think I'd hear from you for a few days."

"Maur, something has happened and I need you to call the rest of the kids for me."

"Dad, is it Liv? She's okay isn't she?"

"Yes Sweetheart. She's fine. It's about Nick."

"Did something happen to Nick?"

"Maureen, his wife was killed in action."

"Oh, no…"

Elliot could hear Maureen crying.

"Daddy it can't be true. Oh, poor Zara and Nick…he must be out of his mind. What can I do to help?"

"Call the other kids and then make some food dishes to bring over tomorrow will you?"

"You bet Dad. I'll get Kat and Beth to come over to my apartment tonight and we'll make enough for several days."

"That's my girl."

"When do you want us to come over?"

"How about after work tomorrow night?"

"Okay, we'll be there. How's he doing Dad?"

"He's a little lost right now and he's telling Zara right now. We just got here about an hour ago."

"I'll pray for his family and for you and Liv. I love you Dad.

"I love you too Honey."

As Elliot hung up with Maureen he heard Liv reach Captain Cragen.

"Captain, it's Olivia."

"Liv, how's the training going?"

"Don I'm calling about Nick."

"Nick? What's wrong with Nick?"

"Cap, his wife was killed."

"What?"

"We just got back a little while ago. He found out earlier today. I wanted to let you know so you could tell the squad. It's so sad Don. He's telling little Zara right now. I have to go. I'll come by the precinct tomorrow and update everybody, okay?"

"Tell him I am so sorry, I'll be over tomorrow. Okay?"

"Sure."

"I take it the rest of your training is off?"

"Yes, for now."

"I'm glad you're there for him Liv. Is uh…Elliot there too?"

Liv smiled at Elliot as he scooted next to her on the porch swing and started playing with her hair.

"He is."

"Did you talk some more?"

"Stop fishing Captain. Yes, we talked and talked and did other stuff too. I'll tell you more tomorrow."

"Thanks for letting me know about Nick, Liv. I'll let the squad know and I'll see you tomorrow."

"Night Cap."

As Liv hung up she heard Zara screaming inside the house.

"No Daddy. No! No! No! My mommy is not dead. She isn't! Please Daddy. Don't let her be dead!"

Liv started to tear up again and Eliot pulled her into his arms while he prayed for Nick. They listened to the little girl begging her father and could only imagine the impact it was having on Nick. Elliot tenderly stroked his fingers through her hair and whispered to her softly.

After a bit the screen door opened and Nick's mother emerged weeping. Liv went to the woman and held her in her arms. After she calmed down Liv brought her over to the swing and sat her between herself and Elliot.

"Ay dios mio! I can't stand to see her like that! How are we going to survive this? How?"

She collapsed into Liv's chest and they sat with her for another hour while she fell asleep. Nick finally came out on the porch.

"Zara's asleep. She finally exhausted herself and I put her to bed."

Nick ran his hands through his hair and Liv could see the exhaustion taking over.

"Thanks for watching over Ma. She loves us so much and it's hard for her to watch. I'll be sure she gets to bed. I'm going to sleep with Zara. Why don't you guys go home to Liv's and get some rest?"

"Are you sure Nick? We can stay."

"Sleeping on a couch or sitting up isn't rest. Go. I'll be fine."

"You won't be fine, but okay. We let El's kids know and the precinct. You need to just worry about your family. Okay?"

Nick woke his mother and helped her up. He held the door for her to enter the house and then pulled Olivia into a hug.

"Thank you both for being here Liv. You too El. I couldn't have faced this alone."

"Lots of folks love you Nick. We're all here for you."

"I know that. It means so much."

Liv released him and Elliot embraced him briefly and slapped him on the back.

"Night Nick."

When they arrived at her apartment Liv handed Elliot the key so he could open her door. She realized how exhausted she felt, but she wanted Elliot to hold her.

Once inside she pulled him to her bedroom and started undressing him slowly. He did the same for her. Their eyes never left each other. Watching Nick suffer the loss of his wife made them both realize how tenuous life was. They wanted to feel each other tonight…to come together intimately as reassurance. Once they were naked they held hands as they slowly climbed on the bed and faced each other on their knees.

"I love you Liv."

"I love you El. You're everything to me."

Their lips met and they sank into the sheets, making love slowly and reverently before falling asleep in each other's arms.

**A/N: I promise things will start to get better after the funeral next chapter. Really. Just a little more angst. Stay with me.**


	16. Chapter 16

**Deep Running**

**Chapter Sixteen**

**Zebraboymom**

**Disclaimer: They belong to me in my dreams only. **

**Author Notes: Elliot and Liv tell Cragen the good and bad news. Maria is brought home.**

The next morning Olivia and Elliot headed out to the precinct. As they reached the floor SVU was on Elliot got really nervous. He knew Liv had told Fin about them and he had probably told everyone else, but he hadn't seen any of them in a year. How would they feel about seeing him and how would they take the news that he and Liv were together?

Liv squeezed his hand and pushed open the doors they had walked through together so many times. Fin looked up as they entered the squad room hand-in-hand and stood to greet them.

"Elliot Stabler, as I live and breath. Wish it were under better circumstances. How's Nick, Liv?"

Fin wrapped her in a big hug and then shook hands with Elliot.

"Not good Fin. Not good at all."

"Hope this didn't overshadow the joy for you guys. You two deserve a little happiness too. So, you finally told Baby Girl you love her?"

Elliot looked at Liv lovingly and nodded.

"Yeah. Yeah I did."

"It's about time you got your head out of your…"

"Liv. Elliot."

Munch grabbed Olivia in a big hug and then slapped Elliot on the back.

"Sorry to hear about Amaro."

"Is Cap in?"

Cragen came walking out of his office just as she asked. She watched as he and Elliot embraced. Without warning she felt her eyes starting to tear up. She owed the man so much. He was the father she and Elliot never had.

Don smiled at her and pulled her into a warm hug.

"Mad at me?"

"At first, but it was worth it to finally be together."

"I'm so happy for you. I take it you want to talk to me."

"Could we?"

"Come on. Let's get it over with."

Don grinned as they walked into his office.

Rollins came in with both of the interim detectives that had been assigned while Liv and Nick were at training.

"Who was that with Liv?"

Fin grinned at her.

"That's him."

"Him as in Elliot him?"

"The legend lives."

"Wow! No wonder Liv had a crush on him. Wow!"

"Okay. Okay. Enough already."

"I'm just sayin'."

The two new detectives laughed and the five of them started going over the case.

Inside his office Don sat down on the edge of his desk and smiled at Liv and Elliot sitting in the chairs.

"If I had a nickel for every time I had to call the two of you in here."

"Listen Don we wanted you to be the first to know. El and I are getting married and…uh…I'm retiring. I have my twenty years in and I'm moving to Quantico to be with him. I'm so sorry to do this, but I'm giving my two weeks notice."

"I knew this was coming when you called me the first time. I kind of suspected…hoped. Just so you know, I'm retiring at the end of the year myself. I'm handing it over to Munch and I'm calling it a day. I had planned to hand it over to Liv if this didn't work out between you two. Now it will be Munch's headache. I want out. Without you two here it just won't be the same."

Liv smiled at him.

"Thanks Don. That means a lot."

"So when is this wedding supposed to happen?"

"Well, we've decided to wait and give Nick some time to grieve, but in a few months. Liv has to sell her apartment and move out there. I think there might be something for her at Quantico. Bob really liked her and was impressed with some stuff she did in my interview class."

Liv turned to look at Elliot.

"You didn't tell me that."

"I wanted to surprise you. I knew there was no way you were going to want to stay home full time, so when he asked about you I told him you were moving there. I think it would be a couple of classes a day and then you'd have free time."

"Wow! I never had "free time" before. This is going to be different."

Don spoke up.

"But good different."

"Everything is changing so fast."

Don looked at Liv and a knowing look passed between him and Elliot.

"Liv, don't get scared now. These changes are good changes and you are about to start a whole new life full of joy and family. You've more than earned it. Just take it and be happy."

Liv smiled at the two men. Was this really happening? She never thought she'd be able to say good-bye to this place, but now it seemed was the right time.

That night Maureen and Kathleen got out of her car and started unloading the food. There were three casseroles, several salads and a chocolate cake Maureen had made. She knew how much Zara liked chocolate cake.

Elliot was waiting for them on the porch.

"Hi Daddy. How are they all doing?"

"About the way you'd expect. Zara is already in bed. She spent the whole day asking Nick to explain to her what happened to her mommy. She kept crying and saying it wasn't true. She called him a mean daddy for telling such a big lie. Nick is pretty much devastated."

The girls saw their father's eyes become moist.

"She…uh…cried herself into exhaustion and he was able to lay her down."

"Oh, Daddy!"

As Maureen and Kathleen climbed the steps, Elliot embraced them both. The girls held the food out of the way as their strong father almost crushed them in a possessive hug. This was taking a toll on him too.

They sat everything down on the kitchen counter and began setting out paper plates, napkins and cutlery for everyone. Nick's mother shuffled into the kitchen and thanked the girls over and over again for bringing it. She grabbed both of them in a brief hug.

Maureen caught Nick's eyes over his mother's shoulder as he came down the stairs and into the kitchen. The man looked exhausted and so very sad. It was all she could do to force back the tears.

Everyone ate, but they stood around the kitchen. It just felt weird to sit down and have a dinner together. The girls cleaned up afterwards and made a plate for Zara. Liv and Elliot helped them and then the four of them embraced each other in a four-way hug and just stood in the middle of the kitchen locked together.

The girls finally excused themselves and went to say good-bye to Nick and his mother. They were sitting on the couch and Nick was holding the older woman as she slept on his shoulder.

He looked up at the girls and his eyes met Maureen's. She tried to tell him how badly she felt with just a look.

"We…we'll see you at the funeral, okay? Dad said folks will be coming over afterwards, so Beth, Kat and I want to serve food for everyone. Don't worry about a thing. We've got it covered. Others have offered to bring food as well. Just take care of your family. Goodnight Nick."

Nick found it hard to find his voice.

"Goodnight and thank you both."

The girls slipped out and almost ran to their car before they both burst into tears.

Kathleen said it first.

"That was heartbreaking. God, Maur, what would it have been like if Dad had been killed in the line of duty? I can't imagine losing my father and Zara is so young. I'm so glad dad is retired. I'm glad Liv is going to retire too."

"I know Kat, but it's what they do. Nick puts himself in the line of fire every day. I was just thinking how awful it would be for Zara if he got killed. His mother isn't getting any younger and who would care for her?"

They sat and tried to pull themselves together, but it wasn't easy.

Kathleen ended up spending the night at Maureen's, but Maur didn't sleep a wink that night. She tossed and turned and had dreams about Nick dying all night long.

Three days later the casket arrived and Elliot and Liv went with Nick and his mom to the airport. Maureen came over and babysat Zara. The little girl jumped in her arms and wrapped her little arms around her neck.

"Love you Maur."

Nick watched the tender scene with gratitude. He was so glad she had an extended family so to speak. It would help her not to feel so lonely. The only upside of all of this was she was used to Maria being gone all the time anyway. The problem was would she keep thinking she was going to come back after all. He wished things had been different and she could have seen her mother's body as hard as that would have been. It would have made it real for her.

Maureen hugged Zara tightly to her.

"Love you too Sweetie Pie."

Nick looked affectionately at Maureen.

"Thank you so much for being here for her Maureen."

"Are you kidding? Wild horses couldn't drag me away. I took a few days off until after the funeral so if you need me more I can take her anytime."

With a heavy heart they left for the airport.

Zara waved at her daddy from the porch and Nick did his best to give her a believable smile before the car pulled away.

The escort came off the plane as they began to unload her casket. He stood and saluted as the men formally brought out the flag draped coffin and loaded it in the hearse. Afterwards the escort shook their hands and offered his condolences. He explained that he would continue to remain with her right up until they placed her in the ground. Nick was very impressed with the care of his wife by the military. It made him so proud of her.

**A/N: Sorry guys. This was getting super long so I cut it into two chapters. I promise to post tomorrow too.**


	17. Chapter 17

**Deep Running**

**Chapter Seventeen**

**Zebraboymom**

**Disclaimer: They belong to me in my dreams only. **

**Author Notes: The funeral and I promise next chapter is the wedding. I apologize a little for where this story has gone. I got so caught up in Nick and Maureen's story that I've veered away from Elliot and Olivia. I promise the next chapter will be the wedding and lots of E/O fluff. Okay, some N/M fluff too. Grin.**

The following Monday was the funeral.

Nick knelt in front of his daughter as he buckled the strap on her little dress shoes. Maureen and Kathleen had gone out and bought her the shoes and a pretty dress for the funeral. Her cute little socks with bows on them made him want to cry and they hadn't even left the house yet.

"Daddy. I'm sad. Is it okay to be sad?"

"Yes, Pumpkin it is very okay to be sad, especially today. Today we show Mommy how much we love her and all the other people who loved her will come too."

"You're sad too, huh?"

Out of the mouths of babes. He swallowed hard.

"Yes."

"It's okay to be sad. Uncle Elliot and Uncle Munch and Uncle Fin and Uncle Don all said so."

"Well, they would know."

He picked her up and carried her downstairs to the living room that was filled with people who cared about them.

Elliot and Liv were at the bottom of the stairs. Fin, Munch, Rollins, Don and all of Elliot's kids were there. Even Melinda had come along with Casey and Alex. It meant so much to see them all there waiting to escort them.

Nick's eyes settled on Maureen's briefly. She had been crying and his heart clenched at the knowledge that she would cry for him. She didn't know his wife, so he knew she was grieving for his loss. She was so different from Maria, but such an amazing person.

It took four cars to get everyone to the church.

As they walked in to take their places Zara saw the large portrait of her mom in uniform and broke free from Nick to run to it.

"Mommy!"

The little girl stood in front of it and then reached her little hand out to touch the painting. She began to sniffle and Nick scooped her up and carried her to their seats. She threw her arms around Nick's neck and cried. Maureen was sitting on the second row behind them and she reached out to smooth her hair and pat her cheek where it lay on Nick's shoulder. Zara rewarded her with a brief sad little smile. Then she leaned over her dad's shoulder with her tiny little arm and reached for Maureen's hand.

Maureen sat there holding it between both of hers as she rubbed her thumb over the back of her tiny little hand. Nick turned his head and gave her a small smile. She tried to get control of her emotions. It wasn't right for a little girl to have to grow up without her mother. Sometimes life made her so angry.

The church was full of military personnel and several of Maria's friends who were already back in the states or were on leave came. Almost all of the officers that were attending the academy were there as well. There were lots of cops. Nick was well liked and his old squad all came with their wives. He remembered all the police barbecues and picnics that they had been to when they were newly married and so in love.

Elliot and Liv sat on either side of Nick and his mother, quietly giving support.

Nick had decided to give the eulogy himself and Maureen had never been more impressed as he fought the emotions and gave his wife the good-bye she deserved.

Zara's grandmother tried to hold her, but became overwhelmed with emotion and when Zara reached her arms out to Maureen, she took her over the pew and settled her in her lap. The little girl laid her head on Maureen's chest and closed her eyes as she listened to her father's soothing voice. Nick caught sight of the exchange and almost lost it.

At the graveside there was a rifle salute and the blowing of taps along with the sound of bagpipes from a member of her armored division. It was truly moving. Zara put her hands over her ears as the guns went off and Maureen, Kathleen and Beth were all in tears by that time.

The family and their friends stayed at the grave a while longer and Zara asked her dad if her mother was in the coffin. Nick didn't lie.

"Her body is there Zara, but her spirit is with God now and someday when you die, you'll see her again. It will be a long time, but she will still be there waiting for you."

The little girl accepted this and then turned to Maureen, taking her hand.

"Did you make me another chocolate cake Maur?"

Leave it to kids to remind everyone that life goes on.

Maureen bent down to her level.

"Better. I made chocolate cupcakes with sprinkles."

The little girl pulled her towards the car.

"Let's go eat now."

Elliot and Olivia watched the sweet exchange and let out a breath. Things would be okay. They knew it.

Nick's house and backyard was full of people all afternoon. So many folks came to pay their respects. Food also came pouring in and Elliot and Liv pitched in to help the girls with all of it. Even Richard helped. The whole family was touched when Eli and Zara climbed up on the barstools and ate their cupcakes together. Eli reached out and held her hand while they ate.

That was all the comfort she needed from him. He was still too little to say anything, but he knew instinctively that she was sad and Elliot had explained to him about death. It went right over the little boy's head of course, but someday he would understand. For now he knew Zara was sad. His friend was sad because her mommy was gone.

Late in the afternoon people began to say their goodbyes and head out. As the house emptied out the tiredness hit everyone.

Richard took Eli home and the girls finished cleaning up and storing the extra food. They wouldn't need to cook for a week.

Elliot and Liv took Zara upstairs and made sure she got a shower and went to bed.

Nick's mother had gone to bed earlier. The day had taken a toll on her.

Kat and Beth finally left and Maureen found herself alone in the house. She decided to look for Nick and spotted him through the living room window waving at her sisters as they drove off. Maureen made a pass through the house and the backyard one more time looking for stray cups and plates and then took out the trash.

When she finally got out on the porch, Nick was just sitting and staring at the cars driving past.

"Can I sit?"

Nick looked up at her and she saw the tears in his eyes again.

"Uh…sure…I'm not good company though."

"That's okay. I just want to be with you if that's all right. That's what friends do. Right?"

Nick offered her a small smile and she sat down relieved that there was no tension between them.

Nick looked out at the street again.

"I…I'm so conflicted about everythin'. I loved Maria, but when she went overseas our relationship changed. We used to talk about everythin', but we stopped doin' that when we were both put in danger. I wouldn't tell her and she wouldn't tell me. As a result we were driftin' apart. Now I'll never have the chance to make things right."

"Don't beat yourself up. It takes two people to mess things up. I know you Nick. I know I haven't known you very long, but from my viewpoint you would have made things right when she came home."

Nick looked over at her skeptically.

"I'd like to think I would have."

"You would. It's who you are Nick. Can I tell you something?"

"Sure."

"I have known a lot of men and you are not like any of them."

"What do you mean?"

"You are an honorable man Nick. I know for certain that you would have done everything in your power to make your relationship what it once was. You never quit on things. I saw it the times we were together and Liv has told stories about how you never gave up on her or the victims. Nick, no matter what, you are going to feel guilty. It's who you are. Please give yourself some grace."

Nick looked into Maureen's eyes for any hint that she was just trying to placate him. He only saw sincerity. She was so earnest that it touched him deeply. He couldn't help it, he reached out and brushed her hair back. She was so incredibly sweet.

"Thanks, Maur. Thanks so much."

His eyes filled with tears again and he reached for her.

They hugged each other for a few moments and Maureen relished the contact. This man meant too much to her too soon. She hoped someday when he was able to move on they could be more than friends.

They released each other and sat side by side for a while. Maureen was surprised when she felt Nick reach over and take her hand. They sat like that, quietly swinging for a long time and then Maureen surprised Nick by laying her head on his shoulder. Twenty minute later Elliot and Olivia came down and found them asleep on the swing together.

Liv whispered to Elliot.

"She's in love with him. You know that, right?"

Elliot sighed.

"Yeah. I know. It's you and me all over again."

"Pretty much."

"I think it's a good thing though. I think they are just what the other one needs."

"Elliot Stabler, did you just say something profound?"

"I did. I'm not always the Neanderthal you think I am. Let's give them another few minutes."

Elliot dragged her inside and pulled her onto the couch. He kissed her deeply and held her close, nuzzling her with his nose and pressing his lips more and more fervently to hers.

"I don't ever want to lose you. You got that?"

"Same goes for me."

They shamelessly made out until two voices clearing their throats brought them out of their embrace.

"Uh…did we wake you?"

Maureen was the first to respond.

"Yes and I'm pretty sure I'm scarred for life."

"Sorry, We just…"

"…love each other."

Nick smiled sadly at them.

"Be happy guys. Life is too short."

**A/N: The wedding! The wedding is next!**


	18. Chapter 18

**Deep Running**

**Chapter Eighteen**

**Zebraboymom**

**Disclaimer: They belong to me in my dreams only. **

**Author Notes: The wedding. Hooray! By the way, SVUandBonesAddict had asked me how old Nick was. In real life he just turned 38 two days ago, but I think he can play younger, so in my mind he's 34, which is six years older than Maureen. Not too old considering she's a first born and mature for her age. Smile. I think they're perfect together. This one's long you guys. I couldn't decide where to cut it.**

It had been four months since the funeral.

Elliot and Olivia had come back to New York to pack up her apartment for good. They packed in between rounds of making love, eating take out and taking long baths together. Who knew El liked to just lay naked in a tub together? Sigh. A girl could get used to that.

Liv had offered Maureen a deal. She could rent the apartment from her and if she wanted to buy it later she could. Maureen was thrilled with the idea of being so close to work and not having to have roommates anymore.

On moving day everybody showed up to help. Nick showed up right on time and started hauling stuff out to the small moving truck. Liv was only taking a few pieces of furniture, so it was mostly her personal stuff and clothes. She couldn't believe she waited this long to come back and clear out once and for all. She realized she needed that time to believe in what she was doing and that life with Elliot really could be the way she wanted. It had been and more. The last four months had been wonderful and the wedding was in two weeks.

After finding three boxes marked shoes, Elliot and Nick teased her mercilessly about all the boots she owned. The woman was obsessed. As they were carrying the armoire that had belonged to her grandmother down to the truck the kids showed up. Rich jumped in and the girls just stood and watched all the muscles at work.

Maureen was wearing the cutest pair of shorts Nick thought he had ever seen. She was wearing her hair in a ponytail and had a baseball cap on. She was very casual and he thought she looked beautiful. She was a natural beauty and not all made up.

Nick winked at her as she took in the sight of him in jeans and a t-shirt. The man was gorgeous. It was hard to keep reminding herself she was just his friend. She knew he wasn't ready for a relationship yet, but she hoped maybe in the near future he would be.

Although they had only seen each other a few times at Liv and Elliot's or around town, they talked on the phone every week at least two or three times. The conversation was easy and more than once she had volunteered to babysit Zara for him. She had fallen head over heels for the beautiful little girl and vice versa. The little girl always asked to say goodnight when she heard her dad and Maureen talking.

It took all of an hour to get everything Liv wanted into the small truck. They put a few things in Elliot's SUV and then began to paint the bedroom for Maureen. With seven people pitching in they were done in no time. There was laughter and jokes and pizza for lunch and then while the paint dried they unloaded the cars that were filled with Maureen's clothes and personal items. She didn't own any furniture and had been sleeping on a twin bed in the apartment she shared with four other girls. Now she would have Liv's queen-size bed, so Olivia gave her a new set of bedding as a housewarming gift.

By three o'clock, Maureen was all moved in and they were ready to head to Quantico. If they made good time they could be there by eight o'clock or soon thereafter. Everyone had been invited to spend the night and help them unload in the morning.

Elliot and Liv took the loaded SUV, the twins took Rich's car and Nick was driving the rental truck with Maureen and Kathleen. Nick held the driver's side door for Maureen to climb in. With three of them it would mean Maureen got to sit in the middle next to Nick. What a happy coincidence.

Five hours sitting so close to him sounded wonderful. The three friends laughed the whole way there. It was more than Maureen could stand. She was constantly aware of Nick's jeans against her bare leg. Nick was aware of everything from the smell of her shampoo to the lilt of her voice as she laughed at something he or Kat said. He didn't want the trip to end.

The girls had made sandwiches for everyone and once they arrived at Elliot and now Liv's house, they scarfed them down and played cards.

The next day they unloaded the truck and found places for Liv's stuff. Maureen giggled until she completely lost control as Elliot and Nick had to move Olivia's grandmother's rocking chair four times before Liv was happy with it. The guys caught the wink that passed between Liv and Maur. They were just messing with them. Once they set it down, Elliot grabbed Liv and pulled her into the rocker with him, tickling her mercilessly until she cried uncle.

Maureen loved seeing how in love they were. She and Nick exchanged a look and then quietly slipped out of the room to help Richard with more boxes. Maureen kept watching Nick as he and Richard headed back inside with a couple more pieces. Kathleen saw the blush on Maureen's face.

"You are so obvious."

"Lay off me."

"It's sweet Maur. It really is. I'm pretty sure he feels the same way. He's just afraid he's moving on too soon."

"Do you really think so?"

"Yeah, I really think so. Why wouldn't he like you? You're a catch."

"Kat, you have to say that. You're my sister."

"Nope. I don't. You know I don't, so take a compliment will ya?"

They hugged and followed the guys in the house.

Everyone took off after lunch. Maureen offered to ride back with Nick and help him take the truck back, so Kat rode back with the twins. Besides, she wanted to give them a chance to have some alone time. Now that Nick was free she hoped with all her heart that Maureen would find happiness. Nick was the kind of guy who could give her that.

He opened her door for her and smiled as she got inside.

Liv and Elliot stood on the porch and waved as they drove away. It was hard to see them go, but Elliot knew they were adults now and had their own lives. He bent to kiss Liv before they slipped inside their now complete household and chased each other upstairs to christen it again.

Nick and Maureen talked all the way home. They were never at a loss for something to talk about and the atmosphere was comfortable. One thing that was on his mind, made her really happy. He was thinking of changing jobs. The idea that he could possibly leave Zara an orphan had weighed heavily on his mind the past few months. He didn't really want to partner with anyone else after Liv anyway.

Eliot had spoken to Bob Nichols and he had talked to the New York field office of the FBI. Nick had an interview for a non-agent position on Monday. He seriously wanted her opinion as to whether he was doing the right thing. It would mean he would have regular work hours and be able to spend more quality time with his daughter. He would no longer be put in danger. The hours at SVU when they caught a case could mean going days without being able to be with his little girl and she was growing up fast. Maureen encouraged him that he was doing the right thing for Zara.

After they picked up his car and turned in the truck he offered to buy her dinner and help her unpack. Maureen was on cloud nine.

They went to this Mexican restaurant that had the best tamales she had ever eaten.

"You got some other great places to eat up your sleeves?"

"Oh, yeah. I have a favorite Italian place, a great Chinese place and a place that makes burgers that will make your mouth water when you walk in the door. I'd like to take you to all of them if you'll let me Maureen."

"I'd like that Nick. I'd like that a lot, but are you sure?"

"Yeah. I am. I put my life on hold a year ago when Maria went to Iraq. I have a daughter and a job and a life. I loved my wife and I miss her every day, but I want to move forward with you if you want to. We're already friends and I'd say that's the beginning of a great relationship. We'll take it slow, okay?"

"Okay."

After dinner they went back and spent a couple of hours unpacking. They were almost done getting her settled and Maureen begged Nick to help her with one more thing. She had washed her new bedding and wanted him to help her make her bed.

They grinned at each other as they tucked in the sheets and put on the comforter. It was late August and even though Liv had air-conditioning, Maureen folded it at the end. It would be too hot now, but very welcome come winter. The whole task felt very domestic and very intimate. Would they one day be doing this for their own bed?

When they were done Nick threw pillows at her and it turned into a fight. He finally ended it by tackling her to the bed and they rolled and laughed until Maureen couldn't catch her breath. Nick hovered above her pinning her down with an arm on each side of her.

"I should get home. Ma is gonna be wonderin' what took me so long."

"I had a great time tonight Nick."

"Me too."

Both of their hearts were literally beating out of their chests. Nick's eyes slipped down to her lips and for one agonizing second he hesitated before he slowly and tenderly covered hers. It was very chaste, but soft and sweet.

Maureen sighed into the kiss and they were suspended in that first kiss moment before Nick pulled back and cleared his throat.

"So much for goin' slow. I'm sorry Maur. I just…"

"I'm not. It was sweet Nick and I was hoping all night you might."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

He reached out for her hand and pulled her up off the bed into a hug.

"I better go."

They walked to the door hand-in-hand. He gently kissed her on the cheek and reminded her to put on her security chain as she closed the door.

"Yes, Dad."

"What can I say? I'm a cop."

When Nick pulled in his driveway he texted her that he made it home and wished her sweet dreams. Maureen texted him back a goodnight.

She went to sleep dreaming about the kiss.

Two weeks later Elliot and Olivia's wedding took place in their backyard on a warm September afternoon.

Nick and Elliot had spent the weekend before building an arbor for them to get married under. He and Maureen had come together and brought Zara with them. She loved to come and see Uncle El and Aunt Livvy. That night, after Zara went to bed, they told Olivia and Elliot they wanted to start seeing each other. They asked them if they thought it was too soon, but the couple encouraged them that they didn't feel that way at all. Nick was relieved to have their blessing.

Now the arbor was covered in flowers and all their friends and family had come to witness and wish them well.

Nick, Fin, Munch and Rich stood with Elliot. Maureen, Kathleen, Elizabeth and Alex would stand with Olivia. Liv had honored Maureen by asking her to be her maid of honor. Liv had talked to Alex and the woman was in total support of the move. Elliot asked Richard to be his best man and his son glowed with happiness. Zara was the flower girl and Eli carried the rings.

As the wedding procession started, the kids were totally cute together coming across the lawn. Nick smiled at his daughter. She had come a long way in the four and a half months since her mother's death. He watched with Fatherly pride as she tossed the flower petals exuberantly into the air.

One by one the women walked towards the arbor through the rows of chairs filled with family and friends. When Maureen stepped out her hair glistened in the sun. Nick held his breath as she came closer and closer. She looked so beautiful and elegant in her dress. Their eyes were locked on each other and Elliot knew his daughter was lost to this man. He approved, but it looked like one day soon he would have the honor of giving her away.

When Olivia stepped out on the back deck on the arm of their Captain she stole Elliot's breath away. Her hair was pinned up with a few loose curls hanging down. Her dress was strapless and her bronze shoulders glistened in the evening sun. She smiled at him as she walked towards him and it was like they were the only people in the place.

Don kissed Liv and then grabbed Elliot into a hug before addressing the people.

"Today I feel like I'm giving away both my kids, but knowing they are safe with each other couldn't make me happier. Take care of each other. You always have."

Elliot turned to face Liv and he took both of her hands in his as he looked into her eyes and smiled. He could see just the hint of moisture starting there and it made him love her even more.

They just looked at each other for a few moments and then Judge Donnelly cleared her throat.

Elliot grinned as she began the ceremony. He had seen the way she and Cragen had been looking at each other earlier. Don told her he was retiring and it looked like there were some changes taking place in their relationship. Full disclosure?

After the initial welcome and traditional wedding introduction the judge went off book. They didn't expect anything less from her.

"As I look at Elliot and Olivia I remember so many crazy cases. They saved my life on at least one occasion when I was poisoned. They drove me nuts when they were disagreeing, but if one was in trouble, the other was their fierce protector. I have never been more challenged nor more proud of two detectives I have worked with. For a long time I knew they were close. At times I swore they shared a brain and the silent conversations they had with each other never ceased to amaze me."

This got a chuckle out of Fin and Munch.

"I believe they have written vows, so Elliot…"

Elliot's eyes softened as he looked at the woman before him.

"Liv I have spent more than a decade of my life with you. When Don told me he was putting me with a woman I had no idea you would become such a big part of my life. The idea that I could be "friends" with a woman was unfathomable to me, but you became my best friend Liv. Now you've become more than a friend. You are the woman I love and want to spend the rest of my life with. I can't believe you want me, but by the grace of God you do and I can't wait for the next step in our journey. I promise the next decade will be even better. I love you."

"El, the first time I saw you I was so intimidated. You were so strong and so sure of yourself and I spent the first year just trying not to screw up. I wanted to prove to you that I was your equal. You treated me like I was, except for the times when you got scared. I'm sorry about those, but it meant so much that you had my back. You've been the longest relationship I've ever had with a man and you know me better than I know myself sometimes. That's why I fell in love with you. I can't wait for the next decade either. I love you."

The exchange of the rings came next. Before Elliot placed the ring on Liv's finger he had her read the inscription: Partners forever. That was all it took to bring the tears. El reached up to cup her face and brushed them aside with his thumbs. Their eyes were locked on each other as Elizabeth pronounced them husband and wife. The kiss was long and slow and sweet and the entire wedding party erupted in cheers and wolf whistles.

They finally stepped back and the kids attacked them with hugs and kisses. Lizzie said later that she could feel the joy that day.

As the sun began to set the lights that had been put in the trees came on and they all had dinner and cake. There was dancing after wards on a makeshift dance floor and everyone danced.

Liv was resting her head on Elliot's shoulder and he was holding her impossibly close. She was staring dreamily at Nick and Maureen as they danced together. He had his arm around her waist and was holding her hand in his, pressed to his heart. Maureen was looking up at him with such adoration. It made Olivia incredibly happy.

"I hope you have a lot of money in savings."

Elliot pulled back to look in her eyes.

"Why?"

"Because weddings cost a lot and I'd say we're looking at a year to get ready at most."

El looked over to the couple who were lost in each other.

"Yeah, but just think; we've got two more after that."

"Good thing we didn't really retire yet."

"Let's just take it a day at a time."

"I don't know. We might need part time jobs in addition to Quantico. Kathleen is certainly cuddling up to that cop over there."

"What?"

Elliot swung his head around to find Kat dancing with Fin. Liv started giggling.

"Gotcha!"

"Don't scare me like that. I'm not a young man anymore Liv."

"Oh, I guess that means you want me to take it easy with you on the honeymoon. I wouldn't want you to throw your back out or anything."

A low growl came from Elliot as he pressed himself to her.

"You have no idea what I have planned for you young lady. I'll show you who's old."

He captured her lips in a passionate kiss as a preview of things to come.

**A/N: Fluff alert. Honeymoon coming in next chapter. Nick and Maureen move forward in their relationship too. It could get really fluffy. I'm just sayin'.**


	19. Chapter 19

**Deep Running**

**Chapter Nineteen**

**Zebraboymom**

**Disclaimer: They belong to me in my dreams only. **

**Author Notes: Oh what a honeymoon and what are Nick and Maureen up to? I have a retreat this weekend so this will be my last post until late Sunday night or Monday. Sorry Guys, but it's my other job. I like this one much better. I'm thinking only a few more chapters for this one.**

Elliot told Olivia to pack clothes for warm weather, but he refused to tell her where they were going. His cryptic answer was oh, someplace you've dreamed about going. You showed me a long time ago.

That was a head scratcher. She had never told Elliot where she wanted to go, so how did he think he knew?

As they got in line at Hawaiian Airlines the smile on her face started to grow. She remembered the day when he found her home sick. As he made her tea, he found some travel brochures on her counter. The one on top was for Hawaii.

How on earth did he remember that? That was over two years ago.

As they entered the plane Olivia headed back to coach and Elliot caught her arm.

"Oh, no you don't. Liz Donnelly bought us roundtrip first class seats."

"Are you kidding? I've never flown in first class."

"Well, get ready because everything has been taken care of by our friends. They wanted us to have the honeymoon of a lifetime."

Liv settled back into the roomy seats as the flight attendant brought them something to drink. Elliot gave her a soft kiss and they snuggled down together. Flying over the Pacific Ocean was amazing and when they spotted the lush green islands of Hawaii they couldn't help but get excited.

The flight attendants smiled at them as they disembarked.

"Have a wonderful honeymoon."

From Oahu they took one more short hopper flight to Maui, then they picked up their rental car and headed to the hotel.

Olivia couldn't believe her eyes when they arrived for their week stay at Travaasa Hana, considered to be one of the most romantic places to stay in Maui. It was a gift from Don.

They were staying in a Sea Ranch Cottage room that sat right on the ocean and had it's own private Lanai with a hot tub. The wooden shutters that ran all the way around their room could be opened to let in the ocean breezes. It was breathtaking. The bed had beautiful natural cotton bedding.

Liv walked out on the Lanai and took in the view as El put their bags away.

He walked up behind her and put his arms around her waist, sliding his cheek along hers.

"El, it's…it's beautiful."

"And it's all ours for the next ten days."

They stood that way for a long time and then Elliot bent to scoop Liv up in his arms.

"Elliot!"

"Well, you wouldn't let me carry you over the threshold, so I'm carrying you to our marriage bed."

He toed off his shoes and laid Olivia down on the incredibly soft bed. She watched as he eyed her lustfully. He started with her shoes and slowly undressed her: kissing each and every part of her as he removed her clothes. She tried once to start on his, but he slapped her hand away playfully.

When he finally had her breathless with need, Liv tried to reach for him, but he stood back and slowly undressed himself as she watched. Once he was completely naked he climbed on the bed and lowered himself over her. Settling between her legs he bent to kiss her deeply. Liv arched into the kiss and ran her hands up into his short-cropped hair.

"If I'm dreaming, don't wake me up."

"Really Liv? That's kind of a cheesy line."

"Yeah? Well this is the kind of setting made for cheesy lines. I love you Elliot Stabler. I feel like I have forever and I'm finally waking up from the dream and seeing my life for the first time. I think for a long time I didn't believe I deserved a life like this. It's very humbling to find myself with the family I've always wanted and the love of my life."

"Am I?"

"What do you think?"

"I think this love we have is so much deeper than anything I've ever experienced because it was built on such a strong foundation of ultimate trust and friendship.

Elliot and Olivia spent the next two days making love…ordering room service…making love…sitting in the hot tub together…making love…walking on the beach…making love…

On the third day they emerged from their room and started to explore.

They went swimming, took surfing lessons, snorkeled, went on an evening catamaran dinner cruise and drove around the island taking in the sites.

Every night they laid in bed and talked about the future.

Liv and never thought about a future before. Her life had been another day, another perp. Now it was family and friends and her lover and husband. Her husband. It was odd to think about it, but she was someone's wife now.

A smile crept on her face every time she thought about it.

"What's the smile for?"

Liv caught Elliot watching her with his baby blues.

"It's a married woman smile."

"Uh-huh. Care to explain that one?"

Liv got up and walked over to where he was sitting and climbed into his lap.

"I was thinking how much I am looking forward to introducing you as my "husband"."

"Yeah?"

"Oh yeah."

"Well, I am honored to be able to say you're my wife."

"Let's order in tonight."

Elliot smirked.

"Are you sure?"

Liv's lips on his were all it took to get him to agree. The evening turned into a marathon.

The next day they lounged around the pool, sunbathed and swam. Liv watched as Elliot stood on the diving board and jumped into the water. Watching him flex his muscles as his arms went over his head and his body broke the water made her shudder in delight.

The older woman on the chaise lounge next to her commented.

"Is that hunk your husband?"

Liv was taken aback. The lady had to be pushing seventy.

"Yes. Yes he is."

"How long have you been married?"

"Oh, we're on our honeymoon."

"Really? My husband and I like to people watch and we both figured you'd been married for years. There's just a familiarity there between you. How long have you known each other?"

"Over thirteen years."

"What took you so long?"

"It's a long story, but we were friends first."

"He's your best friend isn't he? My Sam and I are the same way. It makes for a wonderful relationship."

"I think so too."

Just then Elliot swam to the side of the pool where Liv was sunning and climbed out. The woman took a long look lingering look at him.

"You and your wife make a beautiful couple young man."

"Thank you, but she's the better half."

"Of that I have no doubt. Well, nice talking to you."

With that she threw off her cover up and dove into the pool.

Liv hoped she was that spry at that age.

"Make a new friend Liv?"

"She was hilarious. She was totally checking you out."

"Eww."

"Can you blame her? You're hot El."

He pulled her up into his arms and nuzzled her neck.

"Hot enough to take back to your cottage and have your way with me?"

"Last one there is a rotten egg."

And that's how the rest of their time there went. It was the best ten days of Liv's life and when they boarded the plane to come home she got a little emotional.

"I will always remember these days with you El."

"How about we come back here on our anniversary next year? We can start saving now."

As they snuggled down for a nap on the plane Liv whispered into his ear.

"You've got yourself a deal."

Nick and Maureen strolled along the path to the park with Zara. She held each of their hands and finally dropped them to skip into the play area. Nick slipped his arm around Maureen's shoulder and they found a bench to watch her play.

"I wonder what Dad and Liv are doing right now."

Nick looked at her over his sunglasses.

"You're kidding, right?"

Maureen blushed.

"Yeah, I know, but there's more to do there than that. I bet they're walking on the beach or snorkeling or some crazy thing they've never done like parasailing. Dad's always been adventurous."

"I'm just glad they're happy. It's funny how things turn out. I had sort of a crush on Liv at first, but then it changed into a deep friendship. Then I met you and lost Maria. It's been a series of changes this year. Now I'm changing jobs and I have this really amazing new woman in my life."

"Oh? Do I know her?"

Nick scooted closer to her and slipped his arm along the back of the bench, tickling her in the armpit.

"I think you know her pretty intimately. I on the other hand am just getting to know her and I like everything I'm finding. I especially like how she is with my daughter."

"Nick that's sweet, but she's really easy to love."

Maureen paused and turned to look at his profile as he watched Zara playing.

"So are you."

Nick turned to look in her eyes.

"Are you saying…?"

"That I love you? Yeah, I am. I know it's only been about five months, but I do Nick. How could I not love you?"

Nick just looked at her for a minute and didn't say anything.

Maureen began to get scared. She knew it was too soon. Why did she say anything? Had she ruined everything?

Nick's smile was so tender and loving.

He leaned in and softly brushed her lips. When he pulled back Maureen's eyelashes fluttered as she opened her eyes to him. She had those beautiful blue Stabler eyes. They made him go weak in the knees.

Nick glanced briefly to be sure Zara was okay and then he turned to face her.

"Maur, I love you too. I've loved you as a friend for the whole time I've known you, but in the last couple of weeks I've been thinking about us together and it just feels right. This isn't rebound. I'm falling in love with the woman you are. I know we said we'd go slowly and I love that you are sensitive to me letting go of my life with Maria. I'm ready to start doing that and I want to move forward with you."

He captured her lips again and they kissed tenderly. A little voice right in front of them gasped.

"Daddy! You kiss Maureen!"

Two guilty adults turned to the little girl.

"I did Zara. I did because I love her and she loves me. Is that okay with you?"

"Daddy she makes you happy. She makes me happy. Why wouldn't it be okay? Can she come and live with us?"

Two adults looked at each other in shock.

"Uh…Zara I think it's a little bit too soon for us to think about moving in."

"But people who love each other live together. You and Mommy lived together. Now Mo Mo can live with us. Then we won't be lonely anymore."

Mo Mo was Zara's new nickname for Maureen. It was really cute and almost sounded like Mama. Maureen had been honored when she started calling her that.

Nick looked at Maureen and they giggled at Zara's sweet, but very simplistic view of things.

"Honey, we are just starting our relationship and someday soon she will probably move in to stay, but we want to date first and be sure we fit together. We also want to be sure that you and her fit together too."

"Well, don't worry. I like her a lot. She's my best friend."

Maureen could feel her eyes filling up. What a sweet kid. It suddenly occurred to her that she would become her kid. She realized she couldn't be happier about that.

Zara reached and grabbed each of their hands.

"Come play with me, okay?"

Nick and Maureen exchanged a look and then began to run after the little girl, chasing her around the playground until she was shrieking in gales of laughter.

Maureen's eyes twinkled as she caught Nick looking at her. She could live on a look like that from him for a week. No one ever looked at her the way he did. How could one man make her feel so special?

The future was looking pretty great right now.

**A/N: I promise a nice long epilogue to tie everything up when I get back from retreat. Thank you all so much for the reviews. They left me speechless at times. Over 200 reviews is a record for one of my stories. Thanks again so much. See you all on Monday. Smile.**


	20. Chapter 20

**Deep Running**

**Chapter Twenty**

**Zebraboymom**

**Disclaimer: They belong to me in my dreams only. **

**Author Notes: Sorry I took so long. When I got home it was catch up time at work and at home. I hate leaving you guys hanging that long without a post. This is the epilogue. It's kind of long, but I wanted to tie all the loose ends up.**

**Three months later**

Liv woke up to find gorgeous blue eyes watching her affectionately.

"Hey Beautiful."

"Hey yourself. Why didn't you wake me?"

"I like watching you sleep. It snowed last night."

"Really?"

"Yep. Just a few inches, but enough to have fun in. You know what today is right?"

"The kids are coming for Christmas. My first Christmas with a family. I can't wait to see all of them, especially Maureen and Nick. Do you realize they've been dating for almost four months now?"

"Don't remind me."

"Oh, come on. You like Nick and I think you would love to have him in the family."

"Liv! I don't want to start thinking that way already."

"Elliot she's twenty-eight years old and they were friends for four months before they started dating, so it's been eight months. I'm just saying. They're in love with each other and I wouldn't be surprised if they become something more soon. Okay?"

"Yeah, I know."

"Now, what time is it?"

"Why?"

"Well, I was thinking maybe we didn't have to get up just yet."

"The kids aren't supposed to be here until lunch time. It's only eight o'clock. What will we do with all that time?"

Liv grinned as Elliot rolled over on top of her and kissed her passionately. This man…her man…

After making love, talking about the holiday plans, making love again and taking a shower together, they finally got dressed. They spotted a car coming up the driveway as they put out food for lunch. It was the kids. Eli flew out of the car and up the stairs to Liv.

"Merry Christmas Livvy."

"Merry Christmas Buddy. I love you."

The twins and Kathleen climbed out and there were hugs all around before bags and tons of presents were unloaded. Everybody decided to wait for them out front and a snowball fight broke out. Eli and Olivia made snow angels and started on a snowman. They all stopped when Nick's car came up the driveway and Zara launched herself from it and ran to Eli. The two children hugged each other tightly as the adults grinned at the sight.

Nick brought his mother at the request of Elliot and Olivia. She got out of the car and beamed at the family, while Nick and Maureen climbed out and joined the group. Kathleen spotted it first.

"Oh no you didn't!"

Nick smiled at Maureen as she held her hand out for Kat and Beth.

Liv looked at Elliot as his lips turned up slightly.

"When did he ask you?"

"Last night. He dressed up like Santa Claus and had Zara dress up as an elf. They surprised me at the office Christmas party."

"Wait. So Zara saw her new mommy kissing Santa Claus?"

Maureen rolled her eyes.

"Keep that up and I may go back to calling you Dickie."

Liv came over and hugged both of them and then Elliot crushed his daughter in a hug and then to everyone's amazement, he did the same thing to Nick.

"Hurt her and I will kill you. That is if Liv doesn't do it first."

Nick looked at Elliot.

"I would never hurt her. If I ever do, I'll turn myself over willingly to you."

Kat and Beth started chanting.

"Kiss. Kiss. Kiss. Kiss."

The rest of the family picked up the chant and Nick turned to Maureen, took her in his arms and kissed her passionately.

Elizabeth sighed.

"Awww."

"Elizabeth Stabler, you are one big romantic."

"Why yes. Yes I am."

"Come on. Let's get everyone unloaded and get settled. We're going to the tree farm this afternoon."

The house was alive with voices and laughter as Olivia stood in the doorway of the kitchen and watched them all make sandwiches and get cups of the tomato basil soup she had made. Elliot was teaching her to cook and she liked it so much she had started taking cooking classes. Turns out there is more to life than take out after all. Who knew?

A pair of strong arms wrapped around her waist and held her close.

"Penny for your thoughts Mrs. Stabler."

"Just watching our family."

"It's going to get bigger. You know that, right? Once the other three get married it will get even bigger. Then there are grandchildren and great-grandchildren. I think we're going to need a bigger house."

"We could always add on to this one. I love it here. I don't ever want to move again."

Elliot turned her in his arms and kissed her softly.

"Eww!"

"Young people eating here."

"Get a room will ya?"

"Oh, right. Like you haven't seen this before."

"Let's go people. The perfect Christmas tree is waiting for us."

They all piled into three cars and headed to P and J Christmas Farm to find a tree. The kids ran ahead and started pointing at trees. Maureen and Liv held back so they could walk and talk together.

"Happy?"

"Oh, Liv, I don't even have words for what I'm feeling."

"I'm so happy for you Honey. Is Kathy excited?"

"She is. Liv would it be too weird if I asked you to be my matron of honor?"

Liv stopped and looked at her; tears filling her eyes.

"Oh, Maur, I would be so honored, but what about your sisters?"

"Would you want to have to pick between them? I'll make them both bridesmaids."

"I see your point. I would be very happy to do that. There's just one thing. You can't tell anybody else in the family, but I think I'm pregnant."

"What?"

"Shh. I bought a pregnancy test yesterday, but I wanted to wait and take it with you here. If I am, I want to surprise Elliot tonight on Christmas Eve."

"Oh, Liv. If you are, he is going to be so excited."

"Do you really think so? I mean he has five kids already and we are heading towards more than middle age. I'm forty-two Maur."

"So. Women even have kids in their fifties these days. You and dad act like you're in your late thirties. It will be fine Liv. Now I can't wait to get back to the house and find out."

They heard Elliot calling loudly for them off to the right somewhere and scurried to catch up with the family who was standing around a huge, bushy tree. It was perfect.

As soon as they arrived back at the house, the two of them disappeared upstairs as the guys set the tree up and the kids went down in the basement to get the decorations. They sat side by side on the edge of the huge tub and waited.

"You look first. It's your pregnancy."

"Let's look together."

Liv picked up the stick and held it between them. They both looked at it and then their eyes lifted to meet each other's. The smile that grew on both their faces was matched only by the brief scream that erupted.

"Shh. They'll hear us."

"Best Christmas ever. I can't wait to see Dad's face."

"Your wedding is in June. How do you feel about a very pregnant matron of honor? I'll be seven months pregnant."

"Are you kidding? I love that my sister or brother will be part of the wedding party."

The two women hugged and then Liv went to hide the stick in the very special container she had. Elliot's voice drifted up the stairs.

"Hey, you two. Stop planning the wedding and get down here. You can do that next week."

"Coming El."

Maureen grinned.

"Wouldn't he have died if you'd said coming Daddy?"

They laughed all the way down the stairs.

Elliot saw how flushed Liv looked as she approached him. She was glowing. Having the kids here really agreed with her.

That night as they all gathered around the fireplace and turned on the tree lights there were oohs and aws all around.

Kathleen started singing Silent Night and the whole group joined in. Liv snuggled up to Elliot as they sang several other carols. When the singing finally ended and everyone was gazing into the fire, she winked at Maureen. They had worked out a plan.

"So, Dad. Is everything set for tomorrow?"

Elliot looked at his daughter confused. Everything was perfect.

"Of course it is. Why do you ask?"

"Uh, maybe Liv forgot something."

Nick looked at Maureen. He knew she was up to something, but what?

Olivia smiled.

"You're right Maureen. El, we need to add one more stocking."

"Huh?"

Liv reached under the couch cushion and produced a tiny velvet stocking that had a question mark embroidered on it. She stood up in front of the fireplace, pulling Elliot up with her. Next to her stocking she had added a hook.

"I think you should hang it right there."

"Liv, what are you up to?"

He stuck his hand in the stocking and pulled out the pregnancy test, knowing immediately what it was. He looked into her soft brown eyes for confirmation.

"Really?"

"Yes, Daddy, really."

Elliot put his arms around her and picked her up off the floor in a big hug. Eli and Zara looked confused, but everyone else erupted in screams and shouts.

"Congratulations!"

That Christmas went down as one of the best Stabler Christmases ever.

In June Nick and Maureen got married with the entire family, all of the SVU squad, and the folks at Quantico in attendance. They got married in the back yard just like Elliot and Olivia, using the same arbor for the exchange of their vows.

Liv was putting the final touches on Maureen's hair along with Kathy. They had forged a new friendship and Liv was so glad that they could share this moment with her under positive terms. They had both laughed when they saw each other at the rehearsal dinner. Both women were pregnant. Each agreed this would have to be their last. They were getting too old for this stuff.

Elliot stood in the doorway and looked at his girls. They were all in one room together. There were his daughters, his wife and his first wife, the mother of his children, up until now. Liv would also be the mother of his child He loved all of them in unique ways, but today his heart was bursting with pride.

Maureen stood up as they adjusted her veil and turned to face him.

"Daddy."

"Oh Maur, you look so beautiful."

He stepped forward and kissed her sweetly.

"Shall we get married?"

"Definitely."

The wedding party walked to the back door leading out to the deck. Richard escorted his mom to her seat and then Zara and Eli once again became flower girl and ring bearer. Beth went next, followed by Kathleen.

When everyone had gone, Liv turned back to face the two people who meant so much in her life.

"Remember the ultrasound when we couldn't see the sex of the baby?"

Two people looked at her with anticipation.

"Remember yesterday you had class so you couldn't go?"

"Yes."

Liv leaned into kiss him.

"I wanted you two to know first. It's a boy."

Both Maureen and Elliot yelled at once and the entire wedding party turned in their seats to see what was going on. Good thing they were still inside.

Liv blew them both another kiss and walked outside to take her place.

As Elliot and Maureen crossed the deck to step down into the yard, everyone turned and watched them. There were murmurs of how beautiful she looked and as she locked eyes with Nick he thought he was going to stop breathing. She was a vision in white and he felt tears forming in his eyes. He couldn't believe he was actually marrying this beautiful and amazing creature.

Their eyes stayed locked on each other as Elliot kissed Maureen and hugged Nick.

"Take care of her. I know you will and I'm proud to think of you as my son now."

The ceremony was perfect and everyone was crying when they said their vows. Maureen talked about never feeling like she fit with anyone before Nick and he talked about being given a second chance at love and how his little girl would grow up with a mother who loved her for who she was.

Once they were pronounced husband and wife Nick planted a kiss on Maureen that curled her toes. As he pulled back she whispered in his ear.

"It's a boy. Liv is having a boy."

Nick forgot everyone was listening.

"A boy? She's having a boy?"

He turned to the crowd of friends and loved ones.

"Hey everybody. Liv's havin' a boy."

Once again the crowd erupted in cheers for both Liv and the newly engaged couple. The family attacked both of them in mad hugs and kisses as the reception went into high gear.

That night as Elliot had the father-daughter dance he smiled down at her.

"Nick's a good guy and I know you're going to have a wonderful life, but I'm going to miss my little girl."

"I'll miss you too Daddy, but I'm so happy you have Liv and my new baby brother to sort of fill in the empty space. Trust me though. You are not getting rid of me. Nick and I are already talking about moving out of New York. Now that he's with the FBI maybe we can get a transfer to Quantico at some point."

"You guys want to live near us?"

"Of course we do Dad. This last year with you has been amazing. I like who you've become. I also like how Liv affects you. She's a good influence and vice versa."

"When did you get to be so smart?"

Maureen rolled her eyes good-naturedly.

"I've always been smart. It just took you a long time to notice."

"Not true. I've watched you grow into the amazing, brilliant, loving, passionate young woman I love."

"Dad."

The song ended and Elliot twirled her into Nick's waiting arms. He swept her across the dance floor under the twinkling lights that were hanging everywhere.

"Mrs. Amaro?"

"Yes. Mr. Amaro?"

"When can we start the honeymoon?"

"How about after the cake and the bouquet and the garter."

"Can we get all that done in thirty minutes?"

Maureen laughed.

"You are so funny. Let's just enjoy this moment and then I promise you the honeymoon you will never forget."

Nick growled and pulled her closer.

"Better not let your dad hear that."

Maureen laughed again. She was giddy with joy.

"Dad understands the birds and the bees. Look around you. There's a sibling every way you look."

"Good point."

Two hours later Nick carried Maureen over the threshold of their honeymoon suite. Tomorrow they would fly to Hawaii and spend a week on Maui in the same cottage as Liv and Elliot had.

Maureen tried to hide the grin on her face.

"I hated saying goodbye to Zara. I wish we could bring her with us. Maybe it's not too late."

Nick's look was incredulous.

"Maur! It's our honeymoon!"

"Gotcha!"

"Oh, you are so going to get it young lady."

He grabbed her and tossed her on the bed as she became lost in dress and petticoat. Nick took off his jacket and tie before he jumped in after her.

"Where'd you go?"

"Find me if you can Nicky."

"Nicky?"

"Yeah, I decided I needed a new pet name."

"Come on Maur. Not Nicky."

"Okay. I have been considering Pepe."

"You wouldn't."

"I'll think about it."

Nick finally got on top of the dress and found his way to Maureen's lips.

He kissed her and then squirmed around on the bed trying to figure out where the zipper was.

"How do I get you out of this thing Maur?"

Maureen rolled him off and stood up, slipping her shoes off and looking up into his eyes. She slowly slid the zipper down to reveal her lingerie and Nick's mouth fell open.

"You've never worn anything like that before."

"I was saving it for tonight."

She stepped forward and divested him of the rest of his clothes before she retreated to the bed, pulling his hand to guide him back as well.

Settling over her, Nick cradled her face in his hands and lowered his mouth to hers. He kissed her deeply. They pulled back and looked at each other. They couldn't believe they had ended up here.

"I love you Maureen."

"I love you too Nick."

The rest of the honeymoon was just as Maureen promised.

Liv couldn't believe it had been a year since the kids had been there for Christmas. Little Donald Stabler was born over the summer and their life changed forever. He was a beautiful mix of Elliot's eyes and dimples and Liv's skin tone and hair color. Her labor had been long and difficult, but Elliot had been there every step of the way. She had cried as he held the boy for the first time. His words were what the kids said he always said.

"Welcome to the world little man. Welcome to the world."

Don was retiring in January and had asked for Grandpa visits. Liv and Elliot were enthusiastic about that. Liv cut back to a couple of classes a week and she and El played tag team parents so she could have an outlet. Quantico loved both of them.

The kids started arriving right on time and Maureen grabbed Liv as soon as they got there. She dragged her upstairs to the master bath.

"What's going on Maur?"

Maureen leaned against the closed door and smiled at her.

It suddenly dawned on her what was going on.

"Yes?"

Maureen nodded.

The screaming could be heard downstairs.

Later that night as they sat around the tree Maureen stood up and walked to the fireplace.

"Nick, could you give me a hand Honey?"

She pulled out the same little stocking that Liv had used and handed it to Nick to place on the hook by her stocking.

Nick looked at Maureen and then at Liv. He knew instantly what was going on. Elliot's eyes went wide. Maureen giggled as both men's faces split into huge smiles.

"Congratulations Nick. You're going to be a father again."

The screaming and jumping up and down could be heard down the road.

That summer Maureen gave birth to a boy as well and the family gathered for the event. He and his uncle Donnie would be a year and four days apart.

The other kids came with boyfriends and a girlfriend and it wasn't lost on Liv or Elliot that the family was growing fast.

When they returned home Elliot suggested a walk. They held Donnie's hands as he toddled down the walkway between them. He had been walking since ten months and they often walked around the lake they loved so much.

Elliot saw the bench where he had so many meaningful conversations with Liv, his daughter, Nick…

Liv came to a stop.

"Shall we sit?"

Elliot was quiet for a bit, thinking about all the great things that had happened that year.

"So, I guess the only running is going to be to weddings and births from now on."

Donnie patted each of their faces as he sat on Elliot's lap.

"I'm glad you stopped running El."

"I'm glad you did too."

"The only place I want to run from now on is into your arms."

"Let's go home. Donnie could use a nap and I'm sure we can think of something to do with the time."

Liv grinned and hopped up.

"Should we run to the car?"

"Absolutely."

Donny and his parents laughed all the way home.

**A/N: That wraps this one up everybody. Thanks for reading and all the reviews. You guys are absolutely the best!**


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